just for the fun - some helpdesk tickets

sprkymrk

jescab wrote:

Now that is a good one to play on fellow techies.......where do we find it...

Open up computer management, right click on the computer name and select "Connect to another computer" (or if you have access to ADUC use it) and select your target computer. Once there, again right click on the compuetr name but this time select "Properties". Go to "Advanced", "Environment Variables Settings", then "Add" a new "System Variable", call it "Prompt" and then type whatever text you like.

garv221

Thought this was pretty funny. Found it on that George site. I would have enabled the messenger service as well.

What kind of idiot buys a computer and willingly – even eagerly – exposes it to all the malware and viruses he can? Me. I bought a Dell Dimension B110 ($468! Cheap!) and tried to kill it for more than two weeks. I clicked on every pop-up and downloaded the gnarliest ****, gambling, and hacker files I could find. It seems our Internet overlords are sterilizing spam. If I were to treat my body the way I treated this computer, I’d have yellow fever, bird flu, and Alzheimer’s. But the Dell? Eh. Somewhat the worse for wear.

– Steve Knopper
Diary of Destruction

Prelaunch: I ask friends and relatives to forward me their nastiest-looking spam. In response, I start getting emails from my mom with discomforting subject lines like “Dating for kinky people!” I disable all my firewalls and virus-protection software.

Day 1: I click on Viagra come-ons, Chinese-language ads, and anything else I can point my cursor at. “Gain” spyware, “MORE SIZE!” enticements, and Free Smut Club offers pop up every few minutes – a decent start. But I crave viruses. Frustratingly, Yahoo Mail refuses to open the dozens of dubious -attachments I’ve forwarded to myself.

Day 2: Craving a less discerning email service, I open jakeusbrownus@dbzmail.com, which features the cartoon Dragonball Z.

Day 4: I receive an email in Portuguese from the Brazilian government announcing that it has rejected an email from me because it contained W32.Netsky.Q@mm. Score! No perceptible impact on my system, but apparently networks in São Paulo have been brought to a standstill.

Day 10: I download Kazaa, search for .xxx, .gif, .rar, .pif, and .exe files, and open everything. My desktop is soon stuffed with pornography, MP3s in Arabic, and pirated copies of Tomb Raider. Within minutes, Explorer has a grand mal seizure – 95 pop-ups and innumerable error messages. Hah!

Day 11: Incredibly, the Dell boots up. I’ve gotten some strange attachments that Yahoo, Outlook, and Eudora won’t let me open. I try copying some from my regular computer to the Dell using an external drive. Nothing.

Day 12: Upon firing up the computer, I get six Internet Explorer pop-ups, one WhenUWin Sweepstakes, and one “The Best Offers.” McAfee VirusScan says I have 25 potentially unwanted files, including W32/Netsky.q@MM!zip and two other viruses. SaferScan finds 1,002 **** files on my hard drive, and my Yahoo Mail inbox has 200 brand-new messages with subject lines like “Tired of dating games?”

Day 18: I take the Dell to Best Buy’s Geek Squad and tell a technician that I’m having a bit of trouble with it. Less than four hours later I get a call back from Carla. She declares it a total loss and advises wiping the hard drive and restoring it with system disks. “The tech ran a couple of virus scans,” she says. “One kept beeping so much that he had to just turn it off.” Ah, that’s the stuff.

strauchr

Ever heard of a program called slippery mouse? Its a program that runs and everytime you move the mouse the cursor just keeps moving and doesn't stop. Quite hilarious.

well I put that into a fellow techies startup folder and he absoloutely freaked. He got me back a few days later with the lame sticky tape of the mouse ball - hes not very technical - but it still got me going.

jim_stasz

I had a user believing that the green power light on her monitor was a retina scanner and before I could reset her password we had to do a scan to make sure she was really her. I couple of people sitting next to her later told me it was one of the funniest things they had ever seen. She had her head twisted sideways, leaning over, yelling into the phone, "Can you see it now?" All the while I am saying, "You have to get a lilttle closer...."

jim_stasz

This one will age me a bit.

Back when DOS was the primary operating system and networks were in their infancy we got a hold of our first copy of PC Anywhere. We're at work, it's about 9:00 PM, and my buddy and I are trying to get this software to work. He and I worked on the same floor but at opposite ends. All total there are about 50 cube-style offices. We'd go to my cube and set the PC up in slave mode and go to his cube and see if we could connect. We just get it working when we see one of the night time cleaning ladies making the rounds, collecting trash from each cube. We can see her just making her way into my cube so we sent some ctrl-key combos to make the slave computer beep. Then we type on the screen, "Hey, how's it going? Yeah, you. I am talking to you." I don't think her feet hit the floor as she went running, screaming out of the building. After we finished laughing we felt pretty bad about scaring her.

zebra-3

Good News just came in, one of the guy from south Africa responsible for all the stupid tickets I have posted (his name is Alain) has just been promoted "Quality Specialist" WTF !!!!!
I know he is a specialist but certainly not for quality !!!!

zebra-3

new ticket

Created By: ZA07366/LANG
when deleteing one instance of a repeat calendar entry, all instances of that entry are deleted. please can you look at that? we are clueless (as usual) (SME approver BRUNOB) thanks