Today Is National UnFriend Day: Time to Pull the Trigger

veritas_libertas

I think this a great idea.

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rogue2shadow

I'm going to open a can of worms here.

[senseless whine]

I feel like unfriending on a "social" network is counterproductive lol. I can understand the awkward "removing an ex-" or someone that has wronged you horribly. The point of the matter is it takes quite a few steps to really remove someone and it really takes a lot of effort to do it. What I don't understand is people randomly unfriending people they've known for a decade on a whim (naturally its their choice but it just urks me).

A link is a link and you honestly never know what that link may or may not provide for you in the future (baring you actually know the people you friended in some capacity). Even if you hate that person, that person could be your foot in the door at company X.

I also feel like since FB/Twitter/Myspace(failspace) is so engraved in our culture, removing someone without "reason"(I use this term lightly) is like an indirect disassociation of the self with that individual. You could relate it to breaking up with a sig. other over snail mail but less serious (though it should never have gotten this serious to begin with).

Funniest thing I've seen is you get unfriended, they realize you truly are an asset, and then try to refriend you (this probably extremely common). I know this is all petty bs in the professional realm but this unfriending business does affect people in some way (even if its for a second) just due to the mystery of never knowing why. Its like we've accepted FB as our national "friendship" black book.

There are a million angles to this but for some reason I can't see myself deleting it completely. Naturally, I've set security accordingly but it just seems more like a hassle now rather than an aid.

[/senseless whine]

Back to your regular scheduled programming:

Happy Unfriend day!!!!!

jmritenour

Personally, I'd like to the "ultimate" de-friend and just completely **** Facebook all together. But there are a handful of friends and relatives who live out of state on there, and it's the only way I have to keep up with. I know that I'd be too lazy to go back to emailing/im on a one on one basis, so I look at it as a necessary evil.

The bulk of my friends I wish I had never friended in the first place. I've got the vast majority of them set to not show up on my news feed.

I've gotten a lot more restrictive about how I'll accept friend requests from though. Person who I barely knew in high school who was 2 grades behind me? Nope. Friend of friend of my wife whom I've never actually spoken to? Nope.

varelg

jmritenour wrote: »

Personally, I'd like to the "ultimate" de-friend and just completely **** Facebook all together...

+1 here. Stop fueling somebody else's marketing engine.

Devilsbane

He makes a very good point. I have a lot of these people on my friends list, people who I went to highschool with but don't really talk to anymore. I don't mind having them there, it is nice to check up every once in awhile and I don't have to burden my contact list with their number. And if they want to check up on me, that is fine too. (Since I actually don't post much on my facebook, and when I do I think if this is something I should really be throwing out for the entire world to see.)

Yes, there are some people who I can't stand. But I just don't accept their request in the first place. Then I have no reason to track them down to delete.

veritas_libertas

I feel like FB is nothing more than drama and that is the reason why I don't use the Facebook account I have. LinkedIN I use for professional contacts and I try to keep those limited to people that are coworkers or are valuable contacts.

I have removed people from my LinkedIn contacts. One kept sending out aggravating posts that were Spam-Like, and the other is a coworker who was let go for a good reason. I felt that dissasociating with these people was in my best interest.

Devilsbane

veritas_libertas wrote: »

II try to keep those limited to people that are coworkers or are valuable contacts.

So thats why you keep rejecting my request.

But kidding aside, yes Linkedin is a whole different ball game. I keep this pretty much exclusive to business contacts. This isn't to catch up with people from high school or a place to randomly meet someone. You are the people you associate with.

eMeS

varelg wrote: »

+1 here. Stop fueling somebody else's marketing engine.

LOL...you mean like posting on a forum?

MS

veritas_libertas wrote: »

I feel like FB is nothing more than drama and that is the reason why I don't use the Facebook account I have. LinkedIN I use for professional contacts and I try to keep those limited to people that are coworkers or are valuable contacts.

I have removed people from my LinkedIn contacts. One kept sending out aggravating posts that were Spam-Like, and the other is a coworker who was let go for a good reason. I felt that dissasociating with these people was in my best interest.

My sentiments exactly!

I've dumped people on LI that were just plain annoying. I've got one jackass right now that is edging close to the ****-hammer because he keeps trying to schedule an in-person meeting with me. He says he wants to get to know all of the ITIL Gurus in the DFW area....his words, not mine.

I'm a little leery. First, he's not a recruiter, but he works for a big company that we've beat out a couple of times for some key business. The thing is, I think that he doesn't know that I know that we've beat them out...

I just really don't have time for crap like that. My time is valuable, and if I'm not spending it with my kid, delivering on a sale, making the next sale, or posting here (

) then I just don't see the point.

Also, Veritas, it's good to know that because you haven't yet dumped me on LI that you still find me valuable!

MS

veritas_libertas

eMeS wrote: »

Also, Veritas, it's good to know that because you haven't yet dumped me on LI that you still find me valuable!

MS

LOL, I also enjoy following status updates of fellow TE members. I'm probably not that likely to run into you. At least I kind of doubt it. Not that I'm saying your advice isn't valuable, I've learned much about business from that is worth it's weight in gold.

veritas_libertas

Devilsbane wrote: »

So thats why you keep rejecting my request.

But kidding aside, yes Linkedin is a whole different ball game. I keep this pretty much exclusive to business contacts. This isn't to catch up with people from high school or a place to randomly meet someone. You are the people you associate with.

I do?

varelg

Really eMes? Forum = FaceBook?

msteinhilber

varelg wrote: »

Really eMes? Forum = FaceBook?

It's a method of communication where users can network. Forums and discussion groups were social networking before social networking as we define it now ever existed. Facebook and the like just build upon the basic overall concept (users sharing information) to provide a multifaceted approach with a few extra bells and whistles to the same basic concept.

Regarding Facebook? Why just remove a few friends? The last time I logged into Facebook, it was the beginning of a several hour interaction with my PC as I deleted every individual friend, picture, post, etc before ultimately closing the account.

veritas_libertas

It's a method of communication where users can network. Forums and discussion groups were social networking before social networking as we define it now ever existed. Facebook and the like just build upon the basic overall concept (users sharing information) to provide a multifaceted approach with a few extra bells and whistles to the same basic concept.

Exactly! E-mail discussion groups go even further back to the most early existance of the Internet and e-mail. I just finished an excellent book that I higly recommend: Where Wizards stay up late.

msteinhilber wrote: »

Regarding Facebook? Why just remove a few friends? The last time I logged into Facebook, it was the beginning of a several hour interaction with my PC as I deleted every individual friend, picture, post, etc before ultimately closing the account.

This is something that I personally dislike about FB. Why are you not allowed to permanently delete your account? All that personal data should be able to be deleted permanently if you desire to do so.

earweed

True about that. Even when you know longer want it or use it the info is out there.

@Devilsbane- I don't even know if I have you on LI or not. The only ones I KNOW that I have on both for sure are those whose names here resmble the persons real names or that I've corresponded with in the past. Veritas may not know who you actually are.

I've rejected so many linked in and facebook friend requests it's not even funny. There are a lot of people who just aim to max out how many friends they have on these sites. The only people I have on LI are either from TE or professional (or possible professional) connections. I reject all requests from groups/subgroups of people who want to connect as they mostly are those who just want to brag about how many friends or connections they have.
As far as facebook goes the only good thing I can say about it is that I have connected with a lot of old friends from my youth and have even been the go betweeen for my sisters and brother connecting to some of their old friends.

eMeS

varelg wrote: »

Really eMes? Forum = FaceBook?

No, forum equals someone else's marketing engine...think about it. It wasn't a slam or anything; I thought it was funny.

You see, that's what was funny about your post...you used someone else's marketing engine to say basically avoid using someone else's marketing engine.

"It's a big hat, it's funny because it's bigger than a normal sized hat."

Gosh humor sucks when you have to explain it....

MS

Devilsbane

It was a joke, I think I've only requested like 2 people from these forums on there. And again because they are people I've gotten to know pretty well and I think our paths might cross down the road. No offense to anyone here, but I'm not just adding anybody on these forums just to increase my number of connections.

eMeS

veritas_libertas wrote: »

LOL, I also enjoy following status updates of fellow TE members. I'm probably not that likely to run into you. At least I kind of doubt it. Not that I'm saying your advice isn't valuable, I've learned much about business from that is worth it's weight in gold.

You never know...I might need someone to bail me out of jail or something...

MS

veritas_libertas

eMeS wrote: »

You never know...I might need someone to bail me out of jail or something...

MS

or vice versa

tiersten

eMeS wrote: »

You never know...I might need someone to bail me out of jail or something...

Always useful to have. Just make sure they're not sitting next to you in the jail.

hypnotoad

I deleted my FB account today because I realized the ONLY thing anyone talks about is their stupid kids.

If I went on there and talked about my job or house or certs or girlfriend, it would be bragging. But somehow it's ok to talk about your kids 24/7.

In my parent's generation, you had drag yourself to Bingo to hear about people's kids. Now they come to you.

veritas_libertas

hypnotoad wrote: »

I deleted my FB account today because I realized the ONLY thing anyone talks about is their stupid kids.

If I went on there and talked about my job or house or certs or girlfriend, it would be bragging. But somehow it's ok to talk about your kids 24/7.

In my parent's generation, you had drag yourself to Bingo to hear about people's kids. Now they come to you.

LOL, isn't that the truth. I've also learned that the Social Networking scene can be strangely emotional. If you don't accept a friend request people take it very personally. I've decided that I want nothing to do with this kind of experience:

Me: Yikes, my boss wants to friend me!

Boss: You haven't accepted my friend request yet!

I try to avoid situations that can be detrimental to my health

Turgon

veritas_libertas wrote: »

I think this a great idea.

Today Is National UnFriend Day: Time to Pull the Trigger

I think people have really lost perspective and spend far too much time on the grid.

Watching a TV programme recently it's clear the police are wasting far too much time responding to personal issues stoked by facebook tit for tat and what have you. My advice to everybody, get out of the house more. If the online thing causes issues just get off the grid and find something far more productive to do with your time and energies.

I recall a TV advert by Denis Leary back in the late nineties for a well known beer. He responded to the smiley saying 'Hey man get wired' by pulling all the plugs out and saying 'get a life'.

Everything in moderation. Online is a part of life, but just a part. Get out of the house and get some exercise.

apena7

hypnotoad wrote: »

I deleted my FB account today because I realized the ONLY thing anyone talks about is their stupid kids.

If I went on there and talked about my job or house or certs or girlfriend, it would be bragging. But somehow it's ok to talk about your kids 24/7.

In my parent's generation, you had drag yourself to Bingo to hear about people's kids. Now they come to you.

What really ticks me off is when parents post pictures of their kids in "bath-time" or whatnot. I mean, come on! Not only do they have the nerve to snap pictures of their 4-year-olds naked, but then they have to humiliate them by posting them on facebook where it will remain forever and viewed by who knows what. It's sheer stupidity and pure lack of decency if you ask me.

eMeS

eMeS wrote: »

LI've got one jackass right now that is edging close to the ****-hammer because he keeps trying to schedule an in-person meeting with me.

Yep, he just got dumped...too many random status updates/posts on LI with complete nonsense.

I can't stand the plethora of jackasses out there saying things such as "IT needs to adopt a marketing mindset starting at the smallest component in the infrastructure."

MS

Turgon

eMeS wrote: »

Yep, he just got dumped...too many random status updates/posts on LI with complete nonsense.

I can't stand the plethora of jackasses out there saying things such as "IT needs to adopt a marketing mindset starting at the smallest component in the infrastructure."

MS

Oh please, would that be more glib utopian nonsense by any chance? Making that happen even 10% is a big ask in many environments.

In my experience working for very large companies the infrastructure teams are often the last to be informed once a sale has been closed. The marketing experts wouldn't know a 7206VXR if it landed on their heads. Fortunately the poor devils who have to make the miracle work do. If they are going to accomplish that without breaking everything else the last thing they need is to be banging their heads against the glass ceiling to drive some sort of reality check in presales, or worse still being forced to sit in marketing basics seminars. They need to stay suffering at command line. The people above them need to stop the suffering. Somebody at the top needs to sort these problems out.

eMeS

Turgon wrote: »

Oh please, would that be more glib utopian nonsense by any chance?

I'd agree that it's nonsense. However, Utopians at least have a noble goal. Chuckleheads that spout that kind of nonsense are really just a demonstrating an extreme form of laziness.

MS

Sabalo

Turgon wrote: »

I think people have really lost perspective and spend far too much time on the grid.

Watching a TV programme recently it's clear the police are wasting far too much time responding to personal issues stoked by facebook tit for tat and what have you. My advice to everybody, get out of the house more. If the online thing causes issues just get off the grid and find something far more productive to do with your time and energies.

I recall a TV advert by Denis Leary back in the late nineties for a well known beer. He responded to the smiley saying 'Hey man get wired' by pulling all the plugs out and saying 'get a life'.

Everything in moderation. Online is a part of life, but just a part. Get out of the house and get some exercise.

Iraq counts, right? I mean, a 128K connection is essentially off of the grid.

Turgon

eMeS wrote: »

I'd agree that it's nonsense. However, Utopians at least have a noble goal. Chuckleheads that spout that kind of nonsense are really just a demonstrating an extreme form of laziness.
MS

Yes. I guess it really all depends on what sort of Utopia someone has in mind. Im all for noble goals but getting there usually requires a dose of reality.