Need Good IT/Networking Jokes

Need some GOOD jokes for the water cooler. All I have is, "What is the best part about UDP jokes? I don't care if you get them or not." It is funny, but also lame. Whaddaya got?

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Bokeh

When does a person decide to become an IT professional? When they realize they do not have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.

Whats an IT Auditor? Someone who arrives after the battle and bayonets all the wounded.

Ok last one ..... Four engineers get in a car. The car wont start. The mechanical engineer says “It’s a broken starter.”

The electrical engineer says “Dead Battery.”

The chemical engineer says “Impurities in the gasoline.”

The IT engineer says “Hey guys, I have an idea. How about we all get out of the car and get back in.”

Cpl.Klinger

I don't know what is up with my computer. Right after I put this Chicago Cubs sticker on the side, it can't save or close anything.

PurpleIT

1Cisco1 wrote: »

Need some GOOD jokes for the water cooler. All I have is, "What is the best part about UDP jokes? I don't care if you get them or not." It is funny, but also lame. Whaddaya got?

This is horrendous. I love it!

Bender Rodriguez

Hahaha these are terrible! But if you, like me, laughed at even one of these, you are a certified NERD.

Priston

Most of my jokes that are related to IT are also related to sex.

wes allen

This came across my twitter feed a couple days ago -

"What is the best thing about CISSP jokes? You don't need to know anything about security to get them."

blargoe

What has feathers and says "pieces of seven, pieces of seven"?

A parrot-y error.

About7Narwhal

I have a joke about Dongles and Forking, but I don't want to lose my job for saying it...

Bender Rodriguez

About7Narwhal wrote: »

I have a joke about Dongles and Forking, but I don't want to lose my job for saying it...

Hahahaha I saw that. ¦̵̱ ̵̱ ̵̱ ̵̱ ̵̱(̢ ̡͇̅└͇̅┘͇̅ (▤8כ−◦ ROFL!

Master Of Puppets

I have hundreds but they are pretty standard and you probably already know them. Like this one that most of you are likely familiar with:

I'd tell you a UDP joke but I'm not sure you'd get it...

Essendon

Here's a whole thread dedicated to this topic!

http://www.techexams.net/forums/off-topic/83662-network-jokes.html

Priston

Person 1: I'm on a diet and trying to eat more fiber.
Person 2: Singlemode or multimode?