Man charged with battery after passing gas

IT_AdminIT_Admin Member Posts: 158
This was just too funny not to post.

SOUTH CHARLESTON, W.Va.–A West Virginia man who police said passed gas and fanned it toward a patrolman has been charged with battery on a police officer.

Jose A. Cruz, 34, of Clarksburg, was pulled over early Tuesday for driving without headlights, police said. According to the criminal complaint, Cruz smelled of alcohol, had slurred speech and failed three field sobriety tests before he was handcuffed and taken to a police station for a breathalyzer test.

As Patrolman T.E. Parsons prepared the machine, Cruz scooted his chair toward Parsons, lifted his leg and "passed gas loudly," the complaint said.

Cruz, according to complaint, then fanned the gas toward the officer.

"The gas was very odorous and created contact of an insulting or provoking nature with Patrolman Parsons," the complaint alleged.

He was also charged with driving under the influence, driving without headlights and two counts of obstruction.

Cruz acknowledged passing gas, but said he didn't move his chair toward the officer nor aim gas at the patrolman. He said he had an upset stomach at the time, but police denied his request to go to the bathroom when he first arrived at the station.

"I couldn't hold it no more," he said.

He also denied being drunk and uncooperative as the police complaint alleged. He added he was upset at being prepared for a breathalyzer test while having an asthma attack. The police statement said he later resisted being secured for a trip to a hospital that he requested for asthma treatment.

Cruz said the officers thought the gas incident was funny when it happened and laughed about it with him.

"This is ridiculous," he said. "I could be facing time."
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Comments

  • rfult001rfult001 Member Posts: 407
    LMAO! I feel a little bad for the guy having an asthma attack, but that some funny stuff right there I tell ya.
  • paintb4707paintb4707 Member Posts: 420
    How is farting on an officer considered bodily harm?
  • shednikshednik Member Posts: 2,005
    That is ridiculous
  • snadamsnadam Member Posts: 2,234 ■■■■□□□□□□
    why did the guy rip ass on an office in the first place? While I dont necessarily agree with the crime charged for it, there has to be something along the lines of 'insubordinate behavior' that should be charged.

    Besides, there was a good chance the officer could have gotten pink-eye icon_wink.gif
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  • networker050184networker050184 Mod Posts: 11,962 Mod
    snadam wrote:
    Besides, there was a good chance the officer could have gotten pink-eye icon_wink.gif

    icon_lol.gif
    An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made.
  • tierstentiersten Member Posts: 4,505
    Considering how liberally some people apply their perfume or aftershave, I would expect more cases like this soon...

    Can I claim mental assault if I think somebody is really fugly?
  • paintb4707paintb4707 Member Posts: 420
    snadam wrote:
    why did the guy rip ass on an office in the first place? While I dont necessarily agree with the crime charged for it, there has to be something along the lines of 'insubordinate behavior' that should be charged.

    Besides, there was a good chance the officer could have gotten pink-eye icon_wink.gif

    I don't see how farting on anyone could be classified as any crime. Maybe if he pulled his pants down, then that would be indecent exposure but it doesn't say that he did.
  • snadamsnadam Member Posts: 2,234 ■■■■□□□□□□
    paintb4707 wrote:
    snadam wrote:
    why did the guy rip ass on an office in the first place? While I dont necessarily agree with the crime charged for it, there has to be something along the lines of 'insubordinate behavior' that should be charged.

    Besides, there was a good chance the officer could have gotten pink-eye icon_wink.gif

    I don't see how farting on anyone could be classified as any crime. Maybe if he pulled his pants down, then that would be indecent exposure but it doesn't say that he did.

    "Assault with a deadly fart"?

    childish? yes. Hilarious? HELL YEA!!! icon_lol.gif
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  • HeroPsychoHeroPsycho Inactive Imported Users Posts: 1,940
    paintb4707 wrote:
    How is farting on an officer considered bodily harm?

    Depends on the fart... icon_lol.gif
    Good luck to all!
  • paintb4707paintb4707 Member Posts: 420
    HeroPsycho wrote:
    paintb4707 wrote:
    How is farting on an officer considered bodily harm?

    Depends on the fart... icon_lol.gif

    Imagine if he SHARTED? icon_lol.gif
  • rfult001rfult001 Member Posts: 407
    paintb4707 wrote:
    snadam wrote:
    why did the guy rip ass on an office in the first place? While I dont necessarily agree with the crime charged for it, there has to be something along the lines of 'insubordinate behavior' that should be charged.

    Besides, there was a good chance the officer could have gotten pink-eye icon_wink.gif

    I don't see how farting on anyone could be classified as any crime. Maybe if he pulled his pants down, then that would be indecent exposure but it doesn't say that he did.

    Have to say it. Good chance of getting brown-eye... icon_eek.gif
  • KaminskyKaminsky Member Posts: 1,235
    paintb4707 wrote:
    How is farting on an officer considered bodily harm?

    If I was an armed police officer and some twit did that to me I would shoot him in the butthole and claimed self defence !

    It is a rule laid down at the dawn of time that a man can only appreciate his OWN farts Everyone elses are a serious assault !
    Kam.
  • snadamsnadam Member Posts: 2,234 ■■■■□□□□□□
    paintb4707 wrote:
    HeroPsycho wrote:
    paintb4707 wrote:
    How is farting on an officer considered bodily harm?

    Depends on the fart... icon_lol.gif

    Imagine if he SHARTED? icon_lol.gif


    again, chance of pink-eye icon_wink.gif
    **** ARE FOR CHUMPS! Don't be a chump! Validate your material with certguard.com search engine

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  • L0gicB0mb508L0gicB0mb508 Member Posts: 538
    Well geez, West Virgina made Techexams. I don't live very far from Clarksburg. Most cops here probably deserve it anyway. hah.
    I bring nothing useful to the table...
  • SilentsoulSilentsoul Member Posts: 260
    My question is where are the parents in all this?
  • cbigbrickcbigbrick Member Posts: 284
    And in conclusion your point was.....???

    Don't get so upset...it's just ones and zeros.
  • moss12moss12 Banned Posts: 220 ■■□□□□□□□□
    far out man i cant stop laughing at this
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