Well I've got some phenomenal news. I was going to save it for my ten-thousandth post in order to appease some of my
stalkers. However, someone called my heterosexuality into question and told me to just post it already.
I've accepted a position as a Traveling Security Engineer for a well-respected security consulting company in Baton Rouge. I recently received confirmation that I passed the background check and am officially in. Pentesting and social engineering will be some of my primary responsibilities. This is in all honesty my dream job, and I'm absolutely ecstatic. The only downside is that tonight might be a bit rough

This all came about because I invited
Paul Boz (who is employed there) to get together while he was in town. Therefore, I believe the moral of the story is that you should never pass up the opportunity to take out a crazy Southerner for drinks!
P.S. Thanks for the motivation for the thread title