Resume critique

I've started looking for another job to climb the ladder. I think I've built up some decent experience where I'm at but it's becoming kind of stagnant and there's no chance of advancement. I've attached an edited resume, constructive criticism on it is more than welcome.

Some things that I'm questioning on it:

1. The summary is brief, too brief?
2. 'Network design and implementation' is on my resume. What I've actually done is move outliers onto a different network and take some off the internet. Unfortunately unmanaged switches so it can't be done the preferred way. I don't know how to word this so I went with a generic term. Any ideas?
3. I've greatly reduced the amount of support 'tickets', really just email, phone and face-to-face support calls from around a dozen a day to

a day on average. I know success like this is often mentioned under the job but I'm not sure how to express it.
4. I didn't do the full migrations of 2003 server to 2012 but assisted with them. Should I put 'assisted' or leave as is?
5. I'm looking to transition into a networking role. Currently plan to send my resume for another Sys Admin position that has cisco equipment and the position works alongside net admins. Should I adjust my resume to more of a network role? I've studied CCENT and have my own lab but I wouldn't say I'm ready to touch production routers and switches without guidance.

resume_edit.doc

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Comments

cyberguypr

In before srabbie

Before I say something, is this just a rough draft?

srabiee

LOL. Yep, you beat me to this one.

I'll hold off until we get some more info.

techfiend

It's a first draft, not necessarily a rough draft, only spent about an hour on it. I don't really plan to stylize it much, if at all, I've had many HR tell me it distracts from the content.

I was thinking about addressing the OP to srabiee et al, honest. I see (s)he replies to all resume threads and gives a lot of good advice.

srabiee

As far as the formatting goes, you would definitely benefit from a proper resume template. Consider using the popular ptilsen format. Or I'm sure a Google search for IT resume template would come up with a lot of good ideas.

As it stands, your experience section simply looks like you brainstormed and jotted down a bunch of technologies and software that you previously worked with. (That's certainly a good first step)
Now you need to take this information and properly convey to the reader what you accomplished. Take a look at ptilsen's resume on how to properly format and write this section. Beginning each sentence with an action verb is important. You want to write as academically as possible. Also, consider using the STAR method. (I will link you to the appropriate document)

Within the professional experience section, each job description should begin with a high-level overview of your daily duties and responsibilities, and then use bullets to highlight special achievements, projects, promotions, etc. Don't rely solely on bullets like this. Again, take a look at ptilsen's resume.

When writing your professional summary and using action verbs, make sure you use past tense and be consistent. Also, you want to vary your language as much as possible (thesaurus is an excellent tool), and again, write as academically as possible. You really want to convey intelligence to the reader. (that's my advice anyway)

I would recommend listing the education section before the certifications section.

This is an excellent resume guide with example resumes, a huge list of action verbs, sample summaries, etc:

http://www.filedropper.com/resumeguide

This thread contains a fantastic example of a properly formatted and written resume (ptilsen's resume):

Resume time

Someone recently uploaded this document regarding the "STAR Method" of writing resume content. You may want to take a look at it and see if it helps you.

http://www.filedropper.com/starmethod

I refrained from commenting too much on the content itself, because I don't want to overwhelm you, and also because your resume needs some serious work at this point. As I mentioned before, it resembles a brainstorming of ideas at this point. With time, effort, and proper revision cycles, I'm sure this thing will really turn out nicely if you're willing to put in the time. You should have seen my "old" resume from a few years ago. It was a freaking disaster, lol. Thank goodness for Techexams.

I look forward to seeing your next revision.

techfiend

Thanks for taking the time to write all that out and I just happen to have a night off of WGU after turning in the last literature task, toughest course to going on that I can remember. No better time to work on writing a resume, except maybe after the capstone.

This is my first chronological resume and I kept my functional one very simple with brief information and it worked surprisingly well. I'll take a look at ptilsen's resume again, I'm in the same job market and location and it seemed to work well for him. Also the filedropper links that I haven't looked at yet. I never thought I'd be needing a resume ~6 months into my first IT job and have been passing over the resume threads because of it.

One concern I have of going to an overview is it will make the resume really short. I also don't have any specific daily duties (it's kind of nice) and my sole responsibility is keeping the systems working as intended, with the occasional tablet troubleshooting.

techfiend

Attached a vastly different resume. I heavily based it off of ptilsen's resume and ended up mentioning assist in server migration. I think the summary needs more work but running out of room to fit one page, and I thought it would be short. My AAS was almost 9 years ago so I decided not to list the year, I'm a career (but not college) changer. Constructive criticism is always welcome.

resume_edit2.doc

srabiee

Try to avoid using first person pronouns if possible. "I" "my" "mine" "me" ...that sort of thing.

If you include the date for your bachelors degree, you should include the date for your associates degree. Keep it consistent.

You don't have to include dates for your certs. It is presumed when you list certs that they are valid and not expired.

Don't list the CCNA until you have earned it. If you have passed the CCENT exam already, you can list that cert instead for the time being.

I wouldn't mention that you are "intermediately" skilled in your summary. There are better ways to convey something like this.

Your professional summary should be elaborated and/or expanded upon. It's a good start, but perhaps a little skimpy. A bit of research should give you plenty of ideas on what you could include to flesh it out a bit.

Make sure you are consistent with your usage of the past tense in your experience section. It looks like you are using a mixture of present tense and past tense. I would recommend writing everything in the past tense.

Drop the "on occasion" part, as it's unnecessary.

This is definitely coming along.

techfiend

I ended up adding date to aas, removed "occasionally" and added a bit to the summary last week (still too short?) and sent it to a few places. One that would be a 150% raise doing almost the same thing in a microsoft/cisco environment and a cyberark implementation position I'm really unqualified for but they reached out to me about it. they liked that I had Sec+ and Proj+ and are having problems finding PMP's to fill the role.

Since I sent it out the only changes I've made are removed 'intermediate', removed ccna, I don't have ccent yet, but hope to start studying before July and will get it on there asap. I changed my present job to past tense. I would think it's what you are doing so it would be present tense. Is there any reasons except for consistency to write about your present job in past tense? Things you've achieved?

My associates degree I believe was only ever listed as an AAS degree. I completed humanities, speech, macroeconomics, which are common with associate of arts degrees. Is it possible it's an associates of arts and science degree? What exactly is that?

resume_edit3.doc

srabiee

Not sure about the degree, should be printed on the diploma.

The present-tense vs past-tense for your current job is a matter of personal preference. I personally write the entire resume in past-tense for consistency. I just think it reads better that way. At the end of the day it's totally up to you how you want to write this and what you think sounds the best.

If you need more room on your resume without extending it into a 2nd page (I agree that two pages would be a bad idea at this time), reduce the size of your page margins. I think they are a little too big anyway. Try 0.75 for all four margins and see what you think.

Have you thought about using the ptilsen template for your own resume? I think that template would make your resume look even more professional. It's just a really solid design, IMO.

The font for your name at the top of the resume should be larger than the surrounding font(s). You want your name to stand out.

The first sentence doesn't read right. "Experienced systems administrator focused on cost, time, quality and scope of meeting company goals." I think it's the "of meeting company goals" bit. Honestly, I would recommend rewriting this sentence.

"Well versed in analyzing issues while implementing and documenting solutions." How about elaborating a bit, and saying something like: "Accomplished in troubleshooting, implementing, and documenting IT solutions to support organizational needs." It says basically the same thing but it's a little more fleshed out.

"Maintained all IT infrastructure..." should be "Maintained the entire IT infrastructure..."

"with 30 local and 150 remote employees in an efficient and friendly manner." it sounds like you are referring the the employees as efficient and friendly. I would find another way to word this.

"...issues that occur." occur should be past-tense

"Worked on migrating Server 2003 to 2012 in an ESXi environment..." what version of VMware ESXi? What other VMware products did you work with? Elaborate as much as possible. VMware products are in high demand, the more experience and competency you can convey, the more positive attention to yourself you will draw. Again, you really want to elaborate on some of this stuff.

techfiend

When you talk about formatting like ptilsen's resume do you mean the line up at the top? Everything else is heavily based off of his. I could put a thin line up top but I honestly think that thick partial line is distracting.

Good idea about the margins, digitally it looks fine with the default margins but on paper there's a lot of white space. I'll decrease the margins and adjust font sizes so it fills the page.

All I've done with vmware is install esxi and setup vm's with vsphere client, should this be mentioned along with migrating 2003 to 2012?

I'm not actually focusing on virtual jobs but I know it's common these days. This company might be switching to hyper-v in the near future, kind of looking forward to that.

srabiee

Regarding the formatting, it still looks a little different. Perhaps it's the font, idk. If you are satisfied with it that's all that matters. The line at the top isn't necessary.

I would elaborate on your VMware work as much as possible. Many sysadmin jobs are looking for this type of experience.

techfiend

'Implemented ESXi 5.1 and administrated vSphere' sound okay? I'll have a talk to the senior sys admin at work to see what else he thinks. Oddly, he's fully behind me moving on from my current position.

I changed the font and sizes and added a thin line at the top, I kind of like it. I've attached another edit.

resume_edit4.doc

srabiee

Make sure you use the terminology "Windows Server 2003 to Windows Server 2012" (was it version R2?) and elaborate a bit on what you accomplished during the migration. For example, what migration method(s) did you use? USMT, etc. How many servers? What types of servers? How did you back up the data ahead of time? Lots that you could include.

Regarding VMware, try to include vSphere & vCenter version(s), and elaborate on what you did with them. Also, if you have Horizon View experience, include that as well. Again, details.

techfiend

'Migrated Active Directory\DNS\DHCP, IIS and file servers on Windows Server 2003 R2 to Windows Server 2012 R2. Also migrated SQL server 2005 on Windows Server 2003 R2 to Windows 2008 R2' okay? It was basically add role\program and copy\paste files along with some command line. No specific tool was used to do the migrations.

techfiend

If I decide to apply for a noc position should I change the resume?

srabiee

techfiend wrote: »

'Migrated Active Directory\DNS\DHCP, IIS and file servers on Windows Server 2003 R2 to Windows Server 2012 R2. Also migrated SQL server 2005 on Windows Server 2003 R2 to Windows 2008 R2' okay? It was basically add role\program and copy\paste files along with some command line. No specific tool was used to do the migrations.

The first one sounds ok. For SQL, you don't have to mention Windows Server versions, just SQL versions.

You should always tailor your resume to the job you are applying for.

techfiend

I wonder how I could tailor it for a network position. I haven't really done much with the network there except isolate some old single purpose boxes. That was done the wrong way with unmanaged switches, but better than how it was. I'm not sure that would look good on a resume. I've done some labbing at home but not sure that belongs on the resume. I guess I've dealt with dhcp outage, pretty basic, and switched to a backup wan link in sonicwall.

This resume is definitely working though, I uploaded it to a few sites last night. Received 12 emails today, 7 of them were way over my head senior positions, what do they see? 3 of them were entry level help desk, drive tech and printer tech. Replied to the other 2. I'll plan on updating the resume over the weekend like I used to. The reason I put 2008 R2 there is to show some experience with it, as little as it is. Actually I used it for a couple years at home but that doesn't really count.

srabiee

Labbing at home, I would probably discuss that during the interview. Ideally you would probably want to lab at home and then obtain a corresponding certification that would show competency in the technology. The cert you could add to your resume.

If you want to transition or focus on networking, you just have to do your best to highlight your actual professional experience and accomplishments. Once you get some networking experience, your resume will really bloom.

techfiend

In kind of a weird situation, I've been applying for admin positions that fit my resume and experience level but haven't heard from any of them. On the other hand I've been approached by 3 companies for systems engineer positions that I'm giving my best effort on but can really tell I'm under-qualified for during the phone interview. I hope to have the third companies interview later this week and if I'm declined I plan on asking what they saw on my resume to contact me thinking I'm qualified. I have a feeling it's the migration experience they are interested in and are probably overlooking my years of experience. The reason for being declined in the first 2 were looking for more years of experience and a BS degree. Any thoughts on my resume not catching on for admin positions but they are for engineer positions? Should I be changing my resume?

srabiee

Sometimes the job title itself really doesn't paint a good picture of actual job duties, responsibilities, and requirements. For example, a job title of System Administrator could actually be more engineer focused, and a particular System Engineer role could actually be more day to day administrative type responsibilities. You should focus on assessing each job individually based on the requirements, as the job titles can often be misleading.

Try not to get too intimidated when interviewing for engineering roles. Ideally you want to get your foot in the door, take on additional or more difficult responsibilities, further your career, and make more money. A lot of the technologies you will be working with, you will learn to use on the job. Very rarely does someone stroll into a job knowing 100% about every aspect, technology, and software they will be responsible for. New jobs always involve a learning process and an adjustment period. And that's completely normal.

Good luck!

techfiend

I sent my resume to WGU, they said it looks great and had these very minor suggestions:

1. Put either full address or at least city and state in the header. I did the latter and regularly get asked this question in interviews.
2. Put city, state of the companies in the experience section.
3. Change 'Responsible for' to something else, they suggested 'Managed' and I used it.

As far as success I've had mainly company recruiters calling me regularly for interesting positions that are asking for a lot more experience than I have. I don't quite understand why a person with more years of experience that accomplished the same things have for an advantage, maybe the chance to see more scenarios? I have a feeling this is my biggest bottleneck currently. I don't have any big certificates yet, maybe the CCNA in a few months will help. Also the lack of a bachelor's has been mentioned a few times in interviews. I have yet to get a response from companies I've directly applied to, that's a little concerning but I think beyond my control.

techfiend

I'm in a conundrum. I've been applying with basically the resume I posted above and getting quite a few interviews but there's one big roadblock that keeps coming up, years of experience. Interviewers peruse my experience and mention they are looking for someone like me. Then they ask what I did before my current position, thinking I should have many more years of experience with my current responsibility of sys admin with some engineer tasks. I have none that I've been paid for and explain that but it always takes a turn for the worse after that. I think my lack of years of experience is preventing me from moving on. I really don't see why years of experience matters that much when you can prove you can handle the responsibilities. Every technical interview I've taken lately I've been told I'm at or near the top of the list.

A recruiter told me I should list at least another job on my resume and I thought of listing independent contractor and list some IT tasks I've done without being paid for, which is along the same lines as my professional experience. I was thinking of lying and saying I was paid for these jobs if asked during the interview, because for some unknown reason that matters A LOT. Any thoughts or suggestions?