New Resume Format, what do you think?

After lots of awesome advice here is my latest resume. Please let me know what you think about ANYTHING?

I am trying to get as many eyes on it before I actually send the thing out.

It is still a work in progress so let me know what you like/hate or any recommendations you have to make it stronger.

Thanks for all the help so far!

***made changed please see second ver***

cleared_TE_Resume.pdf

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Comments

cyberguypr

Iguana Man, are 'Senior Network Administrator/Security' and 'Network Information Security' actual titles?

Cyberscum

cyberguypr wrote: »

Iguana Man, are 'Senior Network Administrator/Security' and 'Network Information Security' actual titles?

Well the actual titles are "senior network adm (INFOSEC) and network (INFOSEC). I have ran into people that did not know what INFOSEC was or said it was not appropriate for a civilian resume....

What do you think?

Another thing is that I am assigned as an ISSM and ISSO, so maybe those would be more appropriate roles to list for job title.

philz1982

What job are you targeting? I write a resume for each job I apply for.

Jasiono

How is INFOSEC not appropriate for civvy jobs?

Baffles me.

da_vato

Astetically your resume is awesome. When I'm looking through a stack of resumes I am drawn to the ones that catch my eye immediately. Yours looks nice and appears to flow well; experience (most important) then education followed by certs.

If you intend to send this to industry employers, there is still military jargon peppered throughout such as MAJCOM unless this is going to the greater DoD community then it is fine.

Statements like "Possesses expert level knowledge within" and "Proven abilities in" have personally never sat well with me since they are subjective statements. I would recomend removing the locations of your schools because they honestly add no worth and eat up space.

srabiee

It's looking really good. I agree with cyberguypr, you may want to take another look at your titles and make sure they are correct. "Senior Network Security," "Senior Network Administrator/Security," and "Network Information Security" sound odd to me.

All you really need now is to some really good proofing and you should be all set. Let me see if I can help get you started in that department.

"Security-focused network professional with over twelve years of progressive information security experience." You use the term "security" in that sentence twice, which doesn't read well. I would change the "security-focused" part to something else.

"Possesses expert level knowledge within the information assurance, security and IT operations fields." You might want to change the word "fields" to "domains." I think that may read a bit better.

"Highly effective at driving IT infrastructure security projects to completion with a focus on cost, time, security and scope management." Consider dropping the word "infrastructure," as this doesn't sound quite right.

The high-level overview for your most recent position needs to be written in the past tense to match the corresponding bullets. Make sure everything is consistent.

I highly recommend that you spell out your acronyms and then include the acronym itself in parenthesis. For example, Microsoft System Center Configuration Manager 2007 (SCCM). Don't presume that the reader is going to know what these acronyms mean. Some of them have me completely stumped, and I don't want to have to take the time to Google each one.

Also, you may want to clarify what some of these software and technologies are for. For example, what is "Retina" and what is it used for? Again, don't presume the reader will know this. You don't have to go into great detail. On my resume for example, I mentioned something like "...administered corporate antivirus solutions utilizing Trend Micro Deep Security for protection of virtualized environments." The explanation was brief, but thorough enough to convey to the reader what the software was and what it was used for.

"Procured over $250K worth of hardware and network components for a new military construction including..." You may want to call it a "military construction project."

"Obtained a DIA full certification accreditation for the Unites States command center using ICD 503, NIST (SP) 800-53, CNSS 1253 and various security overlays for accreditation." I have no clue as to what any of this is. That may be because of a total lack of military background, idk.

"Serve as final escalation point..." Should be "served." Again, be careful with the present tense vs past tense stuff.

"Carefully analyzed organization..." I would begin the bullet with "Analyzed" for consistency. (Ideally, you want each of your bullets to begin with an action verb)

"...providing security-focused technology and security solutions..." You used "security" too many time. Redundant vocabulary should be avoided. The thesaurus is a great tool to help avoid this.

"...increased the overall security posture of my organization..." Avoid the use of personal pronouns such as "my." You could say "the organization" instead, or rewrite the sentence as necessary.

"Established a local vulnerability reduction program that increased the overall security posture of my organization and reduced network vulnerabilities by 70% using E-eye Retina and ACAS vulnerability tools and network penetration testers." Minor issue, but this almost reads like a run-on sentence. I think it's the excessive use of "and." Might want to find a way to rework it.

So as to not overwhelm you too much, I'll take another look at this after you get another revision uploaded.

You may want to move the school city and state to the same line as the school's name, for example "Western Governors University – Salt Lake City, Utah"

I've never heard of the SMSP and SMSF certs. Are those both CompTIA certs?

Cyberscum

philz1982 wrote: »

What job are you targeting? I write a resume for each job I apply for.

I am not completely sure at this point. I am getting the basic resume structure down and will modify depending on the position.

Jasiono wrote: »

How is INFOSEC not appropriate for civvy jobs?Baffles me.

Three people have made mention of how odd INFOSEC looked. They recommended to list “information security” or just plain old “security” instead of the acronym INFOSEC. I think “Senior Network Administrator Information Security” would look odd on the resume.

da_vato wrote: »

Astetically your resume is awesome. When I'm looking through a stack of resumes I am drawn to the ones that catch my eye immediately. Yours looks nice and appears to flow well; experience (most important) then education followed by certs.If you intend to send this to industry employers, there is still military jargon peppered throughout such as MAJCOM unless this is going to the greater DoD community then it is fine.Statements like "Possesses expert level knowledge within" and "Proven abilities in" have personally never sat well with me since they are subjective statements. I would recomend removing the locations of your schools because they honestly add no worth and eat up space.

I have not identified exactly who and where this resume will be submitted, but I agree there is still mil lingo that needs to be corrected. I might make one for DoD and a separate civ resume.
What type of statements would replace the subjective statements?
I agree that location is useless for the schools. I was adding it to take up the inch of white space at the bottom of the resume, but I can elaborate on the work experience to fill that space. Thanks for the info!

….@Srabiee….
I will work on the recommendations you provide. I am going to owe you a bottle of scotch after this

networker050184

I like the structure and it's the same I use minus the border. Definitely a big fan of the experience section. I wish more people would use this format when I'm sifting through resumes.

Cyberscum

***Updated resume***

cleared_TE_Resume.pdf

srabiee

I would consider using bold font for your name at the top of the resume to draw attention. Possibly even your title as well.

Regarding your title, "Senior Network Security," it still seems like it's missing the subject matter. Senior network security _______? Administrator? Engineer? Professional? See what I mean?

"Performance-driven technology professional..." I think "Accomplished IT professional..." would sound better, but ultimately it's your call.

"Implemented, supported, and transitioned IT security devices..." What sort of devices?

"Architected" may technically be correct, but it's extremely uncommon and sounds awkward IMO. I would use something like "developed" instead.

"Analyzed organization requirements..." Might want to change to "organizational."

"Directed Data Loss Prevention groups..." Not sure this should be capitalized. Is this a formal title?

Within the April 2004 position, you ended the first two sentences with "...for the section." I would fix that to vary your language.

"Successfully completed multiple security inspections with zero deviations." Is it possible to elaborate on this one a bit more? It's not as verbose and detailed as your other bullets. Not a huge deal, but might be a good idea.

"Independently support 25 users..." Should be "Independently supported 25 users..."

"Established a security training and awareness training program for all unit personnel." Should either be:
a) "Established security training and awareness training programs for all unit personnel." or...
b) "Established security and awareness training programs for all unit personnel."

"Cyber Surety Manager" typo. This was a biggie, be real careful with this stuff. This is why you need a really good proofreader for your resume. My wife is an educator and proofs mine for me.

"Identified potential threats and manage resolution..." should be "managed"

"Established and maintained the units emissions security program that consists of over..." should be "consisted"

Definitely coming along. Mostly just typos and grammatical issues at this point. Easily correctable.

SoCalGuy858

srabiee wrote: »

"Cyber Surety Manager" typo. This was a biggie, be real careful with this stuff. This is why you need a really good proofreader for your resume. My wife is an educator and proofs mine for me.

I looked and looked for this in the PDFs, but couldn't find it, so I assume it was corrected. However, dependent on the context (if it were Air Force), that term (Cyber Surety vs Cyber Security) is actually used...

Cyber Surety - airforce.com

Cyberscum

srabiee wrote: »

"Crazy amounts of great advice"

Thanks again for all of your help. You have provided tremendous insight and advice into the resume writing process.

...As for the cyber surety title; it actually is called "cyber surety" and there again arises the problem of titles in the resume lol

srabiee

Never heard of cyber surety. "Surety" isn't a word that I see or hear very often. Very interesting.

210mike

I think it's a great resume. I especially like the format. I would definitely interview you. Would you be willing to share the word template ?

srabiee

The template is the popular "ptilsen" template, listed below.

This is an excellent resume guide with example resumes, a huge list of action verbs, sample summaries, etc:

http://www.filedropper.com/resumeguide

This thread contains a fantastic example of a properly formatted and written resume (ptilsen's resume):

http://www.techexams.net/forums/jobs-degrees/91333-resume-time.html

Someone recently uploaded this document regarding the "STAR Method" of writing resume content. You may want to take a look at it and see if it helps you.

http://www.filedropper.com/starmethod

/www.filedropper.com/starmethod

the_Grinch

Not to take over your thread, but what were you thoughts on the Social Media certs you have? Worth getting?

Cyberscum

the_Grinch wrote: »

Not to take over your thread, but what were you thoughts on the Social Media certs you have? Worth getting?

Most fun I have had with certs thus far. I actually took classes along with the cert.

-We exploited facebook, twitter, vine and other social media platforms.
-Created false accounts and tricked people into giving PII and other goodies.
-We did some other stuff I cant say on the board.
-We used the social media platforms to mine data on people and products
-Used inference attacks to see if we could track government movements etc...
-Used social media geotags to facilitate other things....

Of course this was all in a classroom environment and in network isolation

It was very surprising how much data is out there.........very surprising.

http://blog.dwwtc.com/comptia/social-media-attacks

We were actually trained by Dr. Scott Wells. Amazing instructor

the_Grinch

Sweet! Thanks for the info!