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Resume Review Please.

SirbloodySirbloody Member Posts: 112
I just realized I haven't updated my resume in a while, I just threw this together so any criticisms/comments/compliments would be great.

Currently I only have help desk experience (I am working to fix that, I do have a home lab in progress and starting WGU for my BS-IT Security on 1 June), so hopefully I can land a NOC position when I get ready to move out of the state (Thinking of moving near Denver.)TEresume.pdf
WGU: BS-IT Security (Start Date 1 June 2013)
Classes Left: EUP1, BOV1, TXC1, TXP1, TYC1, TYP1, LUT1, QBT1, INC1, INT1, GAC1, HHT1, COV1, CQV1, QLT1, BVC1, RIT1, BNC1, IWC1, IWT1, DJV1, TPV1, CVV1, CJV1, CNV1, AGC1, CUV1, EUC1
Completed: CPV1, AXV1, DHV1 BBC1, WFV1, CLC1, CTV1, DRV1. DSV1, LAE1

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    BloogenBloogen Member Posts: 180 ■■■□□□□□□□
    I didn't read it but I will comment on the structure briefly. You have a lot of white space, it looks like you padded white space to fill 2 pages. You might be able to get away with one though if your experience merits it, flesh it out and take out all the spacing.

    The formatting on Employment History needs to put into a table and then make the border = 0, it looks very sloppy when misaligned.

    Review your grammar and punctuation use and try not to use the same leading verb/adjective in your descriptions. Make every line earn it's way onto the page. Instead of saying "Managed xyzor proficient at XYZ try to make a more powerful statement.

    Structure your points a bit more into something like, what you did, what tool/technology you used and what benefit it provided all in one line whenever possible. Compare this to simply mentioning a tool or saying you used XYZ and you will have a much stronger resume.
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    SirbloodySirbloody Member Posts: 112
    Thank you for the review, I am struggling to make it 1 page, I took off some of the work info and fixed the boarder for the Employment History. I will take everything back to the drawing board and see what else I can do to shave it down to 1 page.
    Bloogen wrote: »
    I didn't read it but I will comment on the structure briefly. You have a lot of white space, it looks like you padded white space to fill 2 pages. You might be able to get away with one though if your experience merits it, flesh it out and take out all the spacing.

    The formatting on Employment History needs to put into a table and then make the border = 0, it looks very sloppy when misaligned.

    Review your grammar and punctuation use and try not to use the same leading verb/adjective in your descriptions. Make every line earn it's way onto the page. Instead of saying "Managed xyzor proficient at XYZ try to make a more powerful statement.

    Structure your points a bit more into something like, what you did, what tool/technology you used and what benefit it provided all in one line whenever possible. Compare this to simply mentioning a tool or saying you used XYZ and you will have a much stronger resume.
    WGU: BS-IT Security (Start Date 1 June 2013)
    Classes Left: EUP1, BOV1, TXC1, TXP1, TYC1, TYP1, LUT1, QBT1, INC1, INT1, GAC1, HHT1, COV1, CQV1, QLT1, BVC1, RIT1, BNC1, IWC1, IWT1, DJV1, TPV1, CVV1, CJV1, CNV1, AGC1, CUV1, EUC1
    Completed: CPV1, AXV1, DHV1 BBC1, WFV1, CLC1, CTV1, DRV1. DSV1, LAE1
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    BloogenBloogen Member Posts: 180 ■■■□□□□□□□
    It doesn't have to be one page as long as you make it look like you really used those two pages. I personally have a 2 page resume. With fleshed out job accomplishments and details and some formatting tweaks you could pull off a 2 pager if you feel your not fluffing it.
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    SirbloodySirbloody Member Posts: 112
    Well to be honest, besides my Military training the only jobs I have had outside the Army were level 2-3 helpdesk positions. I do have a home lab setup at home but I do not think it is appropriate to add that on my resume.
    Bloogen wrote: »
    It doesn't have to be one page as long as you make it look like you really used those two pages. I personally have a 2 page resume. With fleshed out job accomplishments and details and some formatting tweaks you could pull off a 2 pager if you feel your not fluffing it.
    WGU: BS-IT Security (Start Date 1 June 2013)
    Classes Left: EUP1, BOV1, TXC1, TXP1, TYC1, TYP1, LUT1, QBT1, INC1, INT1, GAC1, HHT1, COV1, CQV1, QLT1, BVC1, RIT1, BNC1, IWC1, IWT1, DJV1, TPV1, CVV1, CJV1, CNV1, AGC1, CUV1, EUC1
    Completed: CPV1, AXV1, DHV1 BBC1, WFV1, CLC1, CTV1, DRV1. DSV1, LAE1
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    cruwlcruwl Member Posts: 341 ■■□□□□□□□□
    I would go into a lot more detail on the following positions:

     2008-2012 Network Administrator United States Army
     2005-2008 Network Operator United States Army

    I re-read it again, and for 2 pages its very sparse. I would go Into a lot more detail on you past positions. Give more of your responsibilities, technologys used (windows XP/V/7, Server 03/08, VMware ect), skills, projects ect.
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    SirbloodySirbloody Member Posts: 112
    Pretty much from 2008-2012 I was a manager (Army labeled it as a Net Admin though), I was in charge of 5 soldiers at a battalion level IT shop (500-600ish users). I was in charge of $3m worth of equipment and coordinated the Windows XP > Vista migration.

    From 2005-2008 I was pretty much helpdesk/cable person, nothing too special there.
    cruwl wrote: »
    I would go into a lot more detail on the following positions:

     2008-2012 Network Administrator United States Army
     2005-2008 Network Operator United States Army

    I re-read it again, and for 2 pages its very sparse. I would go Into a lot more detail on you past positions. Give more of your responsibilities, technologys used (windows XP/V/7, Server 03/08, VMware ect), skills, projects ect.
    WGU: BS-IT Security (Start Date 1 June 2013)
    Classes Left: EUP1, BOV1, TXC1, TXP1, TYC1, TYP1, LUT1, QBT1, INC1, INT1, GAC1, HHT1, COV1, CQV1, QLT1, BVC1, RIT1, BNC1, IWC1, IWT1, DJV1, TPV1, CVV1, CJV1, CNV1, AGC1, CUV1, EUC1
    Completed: CPV1, AXV1, DHV1 BBC1, WFV1, CLC1, CTV1, DRV1. DSV1, LAE1
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    cruwlcruwl Member Posts: 341 ■■□□□□□□□□
    Sirbloody wrote: »
    Pretty much from 2008-2012 I was a manager (Army labeled it as a Net Admin though), I was in charge of 5 soldiers at a battalion level IT shop (500-600ish users). I was in charge of $3m worth of equipment and coordinated the Windows XP > Vista migration.

    I would put that on my resume.
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