Resume critiquing

Mkiniry9600Mkiniry9600 Member Posts: 11 ■□□□□□□□□□
Hello Everyone,

I am looking for someone to critique
my resume. I have been having trouble in the job market lately. So any help would be great.
Also I will be attending WGU starting in march. Should I put that on the resume.

My resume MKResume.doc.

Thank you all for the help in advance.
WGU B.S. IT - Network Administration: Start Date June 1 2014 |Transferred | In Progress | Required | Completed|
UBT1, ABV1, EBV1, DHV1, EAV1 | ORA1, WFV1, AGC1, CLC1, TBP1, EUP1, EUC1, CUV1, TJC1, TJP1, TCP1
CJC1, BVC1, C278, UBC1, IWC1, IWT1, CRV1, CDC1, CDP1, CTV1,C277, AHV1, C298, MGC1, AIV1, TPV1, BNC1, AJV1, SBT1, RBT1

Comments

  • Mkiniry9600Mkiniry9600 Member Posts: 11 ■□□□□□□□□□
    If anyone could help. I have a job recruiter that needs my resume by tomorrow and I want the advice the community of Techexams before I send it to him.

    Thanks all
    WGU B.S. IT - Network Administration: Start Date June 1 2014 |Transferred | In Progress | Required | Completed|
    UBT1, ABV1, EBV1, DHV1, EAV1 | ORA1, WFV1, AGC1, CLC1, TBP1, EUP1, EUC1, CUV1, TJC1, TJP1, TCP1
    CJC1, BVC1, C278, UBC1, IWC1, IWT1, CRV1, CDC1, CDP1, CTV1,C277, AHV1, C298, MGC1, AIV1, TPV1, BNC1, AJV1, SBT1, RBT1
  • PolynomialPolynomial Member Posts: 365
    None of this is meant to be personal, just very frank and direct. Besides, we're MA buddies! We should be friends.

    Logos are terribad. Cut them.

    Your profile is written like a 6th grader would write. "I this", "I that".

    I don't like how you've bullet pointed each title/description. Its visually jarring.

    I am not sure high school should be on a professional level resume.

    Your job from Palmer, MA is too generic. Replace what you said with specific tech you have worked with.

    Again with the 6th grade writing mentality "My responsibilities..." Just list what you did in declarative statement form.

    I think experience section should be above education. Doubly so because its unfortunately not your strong point.

    Who certified you in Windows 7? Is is an MCSA/MCP certification?
  • Mkiniry9600Mkiniry9600 Member Posts: 11 ■□□□□□□□□□
    I did not take it the wrong way Polynomial my ears are always open.

    I never liked the way my resume was set up you see. It was created by a career service individual. I have always wanted to change it.

    The Windows certification is from Microsoft. It is a MCTS Certification.

    I have realized that my education background is not that impressive, but I am changing that very soon. I will be starting college in April.

    Thank you Polynomial for the over view of my resume. MA Buddies!
    WGU B.S. IT - Network Administration: Start Date June 1 2014 |Transferred | In Progress | Required | Completed|
    UBT1, ABV1, EBV1, DHV1, EAV1 | ORA1, WFV1, AGC1, CLC1, TBP1, EUP1, EUC1, CUV1, TJC1, TJP1, TCP1
    CJC1, BVC1, C278, UBC1, IWC1, IWT1, CRV1, CDC1, CDP1, CTV1,C277, AHV1, C298, MGC1, AIV1, TPV1, BNC1, AJV1, SBT1, RBT1
  • Mkiniry9600Mkiniry9600 Member Posts: 11 ■□□□□□□□□□
    This is a revision of my previous resume. Some of the changes that were made was because of the post by polynomial. I have not changed the profile paragraph yet because I am still not sure how to write this one.


    mResume V3.doc

    Thank you all for the help.

    P.S. Should I but in the education section that I will be attending WGU. I have been accepted and will be starting in April.
    WGU B.S. IT - Network Administration: Start Date June 1 2014 |Transferred | In Progress | Required | Completed|
    UBT1, ABV1, EBV1, DHV1, EAV1 | ORA1, WFV1, AGC1, CLC1, TBP1, EUP1, EUC1, CUV1, TJC1, TJP1, TCP1
    CJC1, BVC1, C278, UBC1, IWC1, IWT1, CRV1, CDC1, CDP1, CTV1,C277, AHV1, C298, MGC1, AIV1, TPV1, BNC1, AJV1, SBT1, RBT1
  • DCDDCD Member Posts: 473 ■■■■□□□□□□
    What did you do this one a mess too. Take off qualifications it doesn't say anything. Also say which MCTS you are I take it you not MCTS for Exchange or SQL. Take off the high school information and move the education below the certifications. And if you change the font to size 10 it should fit on one page.
    Also you may want to remove your personnel info or black it out like the first one.
  • Mkiniry9600Mkiniry9600 Member Posts: 11 ■□□□□□□□□□
    About the personal info long last night and uploaded the wrong one. fixed now.
    WGU B.S. IT - Network Administration: Start Date June 1 2014 |Transferred | In Progress | Required | Completed|
    UBT1, ABV1, EBV1, DHV1, EAV1 | ORA1, WFV1, AGC1, CLC1, TBP1, EUP1, EUC1, CUV1, TJC1, TJP1, TCP1
    CJC1, BVC1, C278, UBC1, IWC1, IWT1, CRV1, CDC1, CDP1, CTV1,C277, AHV1, C298, MGC1, AIV1, TPV1, BNC1, AJV1, SBT1, RBT1
  • DoubleNNsDoubleNNs Member Posts: 2,015 ■■■■■□□□□□
    Get rid of all cases of "I" or "Me" or "My" on your resume. Resumes are usually written in 3rd person.

    You want a harder-hitting "profile" if possible. The main reason why it should be there is to summarize your strengths and hook/lead the reader into your resume. Saying you are "competent" reads to me as just "OK" and even possibly "mediocre."

    What kind of job are you looking for moving forward? You should summarize your strengths in your profile statement (and the rest of your resume) to the strengths needed in that type of job.
    Goals for 2018:
    Certs: RHCSA, LFCS: Ubuntu, CNCF CKA, CNCF CKAD | AWS Certified DevOps Engineer, AWS Solutions Architect Pro, AWS Certified Security Specialist, GCP Professional Cloud Architect
    Learn: Terraform, Kubernetes, Prometheus & Golang | Improve: Docker, Python Programming
    To-do | In Progress | Completed
  • LeifAlireLeifAlire Member Posts: 106
    Not quite the job on the redaction...you can still copy out what you tried to cover over.
    But yes remove the logos I personally never liked them but that is just me...
    2015 Goals: VCP-550 - CISA - 70-417
  • PolynomialPolynomial Member Posts: 365
    This is a bit better. I still think you need to "professionalize" / "embelish" the language a bit.

    On my LinkedIn, for example, under my current job the first sentence is "Support of over 1000 on site employees in a heterogeneous client environment comprised of Windows XP, Vista, 7, OS X 10.5-10.8, iOS, Android and Google Apps".

    Admittedly one of my mentor figures came up with that. But its a long the lines of what makes for a good sounding resume.
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