How to Resign Gracefully?

Long story short, I work for a software development company in the United States. I love my job and what I do. My company has been great to me since I was hired last year.

I was offered a job overseas, and I agreed to take it. I am going to send my paperwork for the work visa tomorrow. Until I receive my work visa, I will not submit my resignation (in case things fall apart and I am unable to get the work visa).

When the time comes to resign, what's the best way to go about it without hurting people's feelings? I am leaving before my first anniversary, which is why I find it difficult to write a resignation letter. I don't want to burn any bridges with this company since they treated me very well. If things do not go well overseas, I will come back and ask to work for them again.

How would you tell your boss that you're leaving? If my work visa comes in at the end of this month, I'm going to give my company a one-month notice that I will be leaving (the job starts in May).

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TheFORCE

No easy way doing something like that especially in a environment that you like working in. Just tell your boss that you are young and want to explore the world and it was always one of your dreams to live abroad in thia country and this is an opportunity to do both work and enjoy life. Mention that you enjoyed working for the company and that they can always reach out to you or that you will keep contact with your coworkers and that in the future you will want to cross paths again and work for this company again. Pretty simple but friendly and to thw point.

si20

TheFORCE has a good point. I'd do that.

We've just had a guy leave our place and he said he loved the job etc. I always find it a bit surprising when people say they love the job but they're moving on. I only start looking at job boards when I start disliking the job/environment and want to move on. If I found a job I loved, i'd not consider moving for anything, even a much higher salary, but if it's what you want to do, then enjoy it! Hope it works out well.

UncleB

I agree with TheFORCE - something along the lines the following would be good:

add your name, position and employee reference at the top along with the date and add your bosses name, title & company to make it official.

Dear "name of boss", I formally tender my resignation from my post at "company name".

My contract stipulates a notice period of xx weeks so I estimate my final day of employment to be "day/month/year".

I would like to make the point that I am in no way unhappy with my position here, but an opportunity has arisen for me to travel overseas and follow a dream I have long held.

My time with this company has taught my a great deal and allowed me to develop personally and I am grateful for your support during my time with you. I would like to keep in touch and hope that our paths cross again in the future.

Thank you again for all you have done for me.

Your faithfully
"your name and signature"

Scan it in and send to him (so you have a proof of when it was sent) and copy it to your personal email address. Give him a few days to make you an offer you can't refuse then send a copy to the HR department to ensure it is recorded - the previous email ensures the notice period is in effect from when you sent the email.

Just in case, back up any personal files (and work files if you feel the need) just in case you are escorted off the premises. Do the same for your desk contents. I've had months of paid "gardening" leave paid by several employers due to the access I had to their systems so it is a good time to catch up on studying and updating your certs.

I hope that helps
Iain

Mitechniq

It's not you, it's me.

636-555-3226

Historically I've always lied. Said a recruiter approached me with a really good offer. A lot more money at a really great company in an amazing-to-live new part of the world. Once I talked to the company and heard the details I knew it was too good to pass up. It's hard for an employer to fault you if you phrase it that way.

kohr-ah

I've always been polite just in case I ever run into this person some how at another company.

Tell them that I thank them for the opportunities that they have given me. Blah blah blah. But I have received another opportunity which I have chosen to pursue which will greatly benefit myself and my family.

That way you are being polite, still saying goodbye, and not burning any bridges.

Legacy User

Yea I agree what TheForce said.

First thing before you say anything I'd recommend you backup any of you data on your computer as I have heard cases that the employer took it personal or it was company policy to let the person go on the spot.

Make sure your resignation is in writing as a buddy of mine quit a job since he was having an issue with the supervisor but left the same day. So it ended up being a weird confusion that the managers felt that they let him go and they gave him enough chances when in reality he quit. Please get it in writing.

Just say you thank them for the opportunity and you would not be where you are today without them. You are grateful for the opportunity to work with the current company and the staff it was a great experience. Tell them your dream is to work abroad and you have been presented with an opportunity to do so and have chosen to take it. Mention that you would like to stay in touch with the current company as you built great relationships with your peers.

danny069

I was in this predicament too at one point, I felt really bad, and the person that hired me, (one of the IT Directors) found a way to bump my pay, but I had to do what I had to do, leave for a better opportunity. While I agree, while there is no easy way to do resign, definitely backup your data and make sure everything is in order before you break the news. A face to face sit down with your manager is the only acceptable way to break this news as far as I'm concerned (if distance is not an issue of course) Then you can always submit an e-mail to your co-workers (print it out) about how you enjoyed working with them (if you did) etc. etc.

jeremywatts2005

I always resign on a Friday afternoon in person and then send the email for historic record. You look better than just sending the letter. Why Friday afternoon you might ask? Because it increases the impact of you leaving. Once you resign on Friday afternoon there is no rest of the week to forget how much you are going to be missed. It creates a since of panic in the employer and by Monday you might have a great counter offer. All weekend they sit and think about what they are going to do without you. The thing is they can do nothing till Monday, this creates a sense of urgency. I have gotten a lot of counter offers this way. With a week to digest they take it easier. Over the weekend the tension mounts and they execs worry more.

markulous

636 makes a good point. I didn't lie but my last employer was cussing up a storm about me leaving but when I told him a recruiter approached me with a 40% pay increase with a more recognizable company he backed off quite a bit.

Kinet1c

I put together something like the following recently:

Dear <boss>,

Please consider this my notice and I will finish with <company> on <date>. I'd like to thank you for the opportunity while at <company> and I had a great experience working with the team and you.

Kind regards,
<employee>

I worked out my notice and my boss didn't speak to me during my entire month's notice period

apr911

Your letter of resignation should be short and sweet. Kinet1c's is pretty much perfect. The letter goes in your employment file so I wouldnt get into the details of why you're leaving or how great the position has been in a letter.

Print and sign the letter and then ask your boss for a time to meet and talk. Dont blindside him and walk in and drop this on them; schedule it. Ask them for 15-20 minutes of their time to discuss a "personal matter." If they ask for more detail on what you want to discuss, tell them something along the lines of "I've had something come up that I wanted to discuss with you, it should only take 15 to 20 minutes and I'd rather discuss it in full when you have time later today/this week"

When you meet with your manager that's when you can discuss how excited you were to get the position, how great the position has been, how much you enjoy working there and see the potential for growth and how you'd like to stay but you've had an opportunity come up that is something you cant pass up.

This is a situation where less is sometimes more. You dont want to get into reasons why you're leaving and I wouldnt get too detailed on the greatness of the company. Detailed reasons for leaving or detailed reasons you like the company can be damaging to your position leaving the manager thinking "if this position was so bad, why didnt you leave sooner" or "if this position is so great, why are you leaving" neither question you'll be able to adequately answer and trying to will just dig yourself a deeper hole.

Now here's some different advice from the "norm" and it really depends on your boss and the employer. From the sounds of things, you and your boss have a good rapport and your employer is pretty good as well. In that case, I would actually recommend you have the conversation with your boss immediately. Tell him you've been approached and have had an opportunity come up that you are pursuing and why (i.e. its an international post and working/traveling overseas is something that really interests you or whatever reason you've decided to pursue it).

Tell them that things are still in the works and that you still have to go through the work-visa application process and that there are still a lot of things that could go wrong that kills the deal and you dont yet know if it'll happen but you have to see it through and if/when the position comes back, you would be leaving for the new company.

You never know what might happen, your work visa might get delayed and instead of a May start its June or July and you're out of work for that time or maybe the visa comes back quickly and the company wants you to start sooner. If you have the conversation now and give them a general timeline (I'll know more sometime in April) the company can stop assigning you new projects in the interim to allow you to finish up old projects rather than having to transition them to another team member.

If you go this route, I certainly wouldn't drag it out, you're living on borrowed time until you affirmatively decided to leave the company or stay (because something fell through) and I would tell the new company that you provisionally accept provided you have confirmation of the employment by XXX date and a scheduled start by YYY date. If the new company balks at that, you can tell them that you are trying to be fair to your current employer.

Again, this route depends on the company culture and your boss. If your boss is the type to fly off the handle or to become passive aggressive (like kinet1c's boss who didnt talk to him for the next month) at news like this its not a conversation you want to have. If your company policy is such that employees are shown the door immediately upon giving notice than you may not want to have this conversation unless you trust your boss not to file the paperwork until you are ready...

Personally, I've had both types of bosses and the one that I told I was looking kept me around indefinitely while the paper work was processed and even served as a character and employment reference while I was still with the company in furtherance of getting the paperwork completed.

blargoe

I was in a similar situation in that I left a job that I liked and had to resign for something better. This is the letter I handed to my manager (CC'd Human Resources).

Dear _____,

Please accept this letter as formal notification of my intent to resign from the position of <job title> at <formal name of company>. My last day of employment will be <month-day-year>.

I recently accepted a position with another company. This is not a decision that I took lightly; rather, much thought and consideration went into this. I feel that this move is best for my family today, and for career advancement down the road. My resignation should not be taken as a negative reflection on <company> as a company, you as a manager, nor the leadership of the company. It has truly been a privilege working at <company> for the past <# of years> years, and I feel blessed to have had the opportunity to be part of the <company> IS team.

Sincerely,

blargoe

For a company that I am not going to miss, I just state facts. I'm leaving, last day is ___, Thanks for the opportunity.

bjpeter

Thank you all for the wonderful advice!

I also appreciate the templates some of you have written that I can use.

I will update you regarding my situation and let you know how everything works out.

bpenn

si20 wrote: »

TheFORCE has a good point. I'd do that.

We've just had a guy leave our place and he said he loved the job etc. I always find it a bit surprising when people say they love the job but they're moving on. I only start looking at job boards when I start disliking the job/environment and want to move on. If I found a job I loved, i'd not consider moving for anything, even a much higher salary, but if it's what you want to do, then enjoy it! Hope it works out well.

I love my current job but I am stagnating here. I wish I could laterally move but it will never happen so I am trying to move on. I want to develop my career and move into more technology and leaving my current job is the only way that will happen.

E Double U

@ bjpeter

I accepted a job offer in Amsterdam so I'll be moving my family to The Netherlands next month (job starts in May). I told my boss about the move the day of my annual review a few weeks ago. I waited to confirm a number of things were completed (pre-employment screening, contract from HR, work/residence permit) before telling el jefe. The company is bummed to see me go, but everyone is happy for me. No bridges are being burned because our CISO has plenty of notice and I'm not quitting to just get a few extra dollars down the road. I made it clear how much I enjoy working here and my decision was based on what's best for my family.

E Double U

si20 wrote: »

I always find it a bit surprising when people say they love the job but they're moving on. I only start looking at job boards when I start disliking the job/environment and want to move on. If I found a job I loved, i'd not consider moving for anything, even a much higher salary, but if it's what you want to do, then enjoy it!

We all leave for different reasons. I'm leaving an employer that I'm fond of to relocate my family to another continent. If I could keep my current job while living abroad I would.

UnixGuy

Kinet1c wrote: »

..

I worked out my notice and my boss didn't speak to me during my entire month's notice period

I really don't like this, I've had bosses sulking like little kids when I put my resignation...but they have no problems changing jobs when they have a better opportunity...Boo-frekin-hoo. Ignore the little cry babies and move on lol.

What I do....of course I resign when I'm usually fed up with my current situation BUT I never say anything negative about my current, I say that it's been amazing and one of the best environment to work at (yeah right), but that I want to take my career to a different direction and I want to grow a different skills (this is actually what I'm trying to do now).

In the past I have different alibis, but always be positive about your current environment and come up with an excuse.

Having said that, this is no guarantee that cry baby bosses won't sulk and take it personally.

PCTechLinc

I was at my last job for 5 years, and I had a really great relationship with the team. I started there before our building (shipping warehouse) officially opened, and was the only IT person there when I left. I wrote three separate Letters of Resignation... one for General Manager, one for HR Manager, and one for Maintenance Manager (my direct boss). I wanted to write something personalized, so that if they were to ever get a call from a future employer, they would say "Yes, he is re-hireable". In fact, during my last week there, the HR Manager called me to his office and told me that it was the best Letter of Resignation he's ever read (don't know if true or not). The three letters were like this, but each differed slightly:

"GM/HR/MM,

We have worked together through 5 years at two different buildings. During this time, I feel our working relationship has grown through mutual respect and honesty. I truly feel like I can approach you with any subject matter, and you will provide honest advice as if you were in my shoes. For this, I appreciate the way you value (company)’s Open Door policy, and how fair you have been in your management position.

It is with a heavy heart that I must move on past my tenure with (company). I began my 5 year career after 6 weeks of being laid off, and the (company) family has helped taken care of me through this time. I personally have been through 3 General Managers, 4 Human Resource Managers, 3 Maintenance Managers, and countless other leaders and associates. I would have to say that our current management staff has grown to be far superior from when (building location) first opened for business those years ago.

My last day with (company) will be (date). During that time, I hope to pass on the knowledge I have with the facility to someone that can satisfactorily take over in my absence. I wish to leave (building location) with the tools necessary to provide the facility with the care it needs and deserves. I leave the lines of communication open for any issues that I may assist. I also leave you with the contact information of all the (other technicians) on my team, as they are more than capable to assist with any questions you may have."

bjpeter

I got my work visa today. (Yay!) Next week, before I turn in my resignation, I'll post it here to get some feedback. Thanks to everyone who posted and shared their ideas.

TomkoTech

Chances are your current company will want to do an exit interview. Just be candid with them. Honesty is usually the best course of action.

bjpeter

I turned in my two weeks' notice today. My general manager said he was sad to see me go because he loved my personality and work ethic. But he also said I should follow my heart and head, and do what is right for me. He said if things don't work out for me in Japan, I am always welcome to come back, and a position will always be open for me.

TheFORCE

Oh man you going to Japan? I like the culture and things like that, but man their work ethic is ridiculous. People work non-stop there, it seems like the work-life balance is off balance there. I hope it works out for you though. Keep us posted with your experience after the 1st month and 3-6 months lol.

TomkoTech

TheFORCE wrote: »

People work non-stop there, it seems like the work-life balance is off balance there. I hope it works out for you though.

Don't they get naps at work? lol

JoJoCal19

Good luck in the new position! I'd definitely be interested in updates on how it's going in Japan. When I met my wife I was actually working on my degree to go to Japan to teach English to start, and later to find another IT job. But after getting married and then starting a family those dreams went away.

cwelber

One bit of advice I will add is I would not just backup all one's data and take it without permission. What ever is really yours hopefully your ex-employer will give to you. I think you have to be very careful as in some cases your employer may see "your data" as "their data" and take it upon themselves to sue you (or worse). Many employment contracts stipulate that all the work product you create on the job belongs to your employer. I think it's tempting to just take all the "good stuff" that was created at ones employer so as to not have to start from stratch at a new shop, but this has landed more then one employee in deep-dodo and in some cases jail if the data is proprietary developed intellectual property. I believe this advice especially holds true if you're going to a competitor. In some cases competitors will put pressure on you to take your former employers data to help them, but this is morally wrong and also they won't be paying your legal fees if it comes to that. Moreover at any serious company all this stuff is monitored and they will know you might be copying data in a non-authorized manner. You might not get all the data you think is yours, but at least you won't be burning a bridge.

Another piece of advice would be to offer to transfer your knowledge to a new person (or in written procedures) and leave enough notice time to do this; not only is this good for your relationship for folks who have been good to you, but who knows, you might even be doing business with them again one day. On the other hand folks who don't see this two-way street view of business many times go down in flames in an ugly manner.

What goes around, comes around.

Best of luck in your new adventure!

cyberguypr

^ this is very good advice. I just went through an extremely similar exfiltration scenario with a departing employee and let's just say the guy's life has been ruined, at least for the next 10 years. Understand what you can and can't do. Remember that every single thing you do leaves a trace somewhere.

coffeeluvr

Best of luck on your new adventure!

bjpeter

Things did not work out in Japan as I had hoped. My GM welcomed me back with open arms. I am back in the same position but with more responsibilities. I love my job!

JoJoCal19

Sorry to hear things didn't work out in Japan. If you care to share, I'd love details. A family we are friends with just got stationed there and love it.