Crisis Calls: Stereotyping Useless Participants

I was reading this and thought others would enjoy this:
http://packetattack.org/2011/04/19/crisis-calls-stereotyping-useless-participants/

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networker050184

That is so accurate its not even funny. Makes me cringe.

docrice

I've witnessed this quite often. That's one article that applies to probably every company out there.

phantasm

That explains almost every day I have at work. Sad, really.

Zartanasaurus

The battle-scarred soldier. This crusty goner will share tales from back in the day about some obscure issue they resolved with a soldering iron and alchemy to fix equipment the company retired two decades ago. He’ll try to make it relevant; you’ll listen to what he says and wait for the point. Don’t hold your breath.

Love that one. Battle-scarred soldiers are good people most of the time though.

Panzer919

docrice wrote: »

I've witnessed this quite often. That's one article that applies to probably every company out there.

I was going to put this in the CCNP section but the more I read it, the more I realized it applies to almost everyone in IT.

rwmidl

So true this is not even funny.

CodeBlox

The blamethrower. I grabbed that term from someone on Twitter, because I find it oh-so appropriate. This is the person who wants to make very sure that whatever’s broken, it wasn’t their fault. Someone didn’t follow procedure. Someone didn’t submit a change control. The vendor didn’t keep a promise. The circumstance was unforeseeable. A code release had unintended consequences. Someone didn’t document a procedure properly. The cable wasn’t labeled. Work was done without their approval. Whatever the excuse, you can bet the blamethrower will keep firing full-blast until they are absolved of responsibility.

The spaghetti chucker. This one throws everything at the wall to see what sticks. With no discernible logic, this person will suggest wild, irrational changes to completely unrelated things in the hopes that motion, however frantic, will be perceived as positive action on the part of management. This individual is running scared and doesn’t really understand how anything works, but hates not feeling useful since he spends most of his time writing e-mails proclaiming his usefulness to his superiors. With the pressure on, he reacts in the only way he knows how – by spouting off about things he heard the guys who do the real work talk about.

Do these really happen? Why toss the blame to someone else? Why would someone want to just toss random ideas hoping something would work?

Panzer919

CodeBlox wrote: »

Do these really happen? Why toss the blame to someone else? Why would someone want to just toss random ideas hoping something would work?

Yes these do unfortunately happen, I would even venture to say that EVERY IT group has at least 1 of these.

Zartanasaurus

CodeBlox wrote: »

Do these really happen?

Oh, hell yes.

networker050184

CodeBlox wrote: »

Do these really happen? Why toss the blame to someone else?

Because some people will do what ever it takes to cover their ass.

CodeBlox wrote: »

Why would someone want to just toss random ideas hoping something would work?

Because they have no idea what they are really talking about.

Both of these happen a lot more than they probably should I've noticed.

Mishra

Hilarious.

I would like to add this:

The Clueless Technician. This is the guy on site that was checking his Facebook when he got a call that they needed his help. He goes back and forth on the phone call being scared and brave which makes it all the more confusing. He makes mistakes and starts to take all the blame on the phone call even though he stepped in when the problem was already occurring.

Panzer919

should probably change the name of the Blamethrower to Bus Driver. The Bus Driver is the person who not only will make sure everyone knows it wasnt them that caused the issue, but will also find someone to take the blame and throw them under the bus usually in front of everyone.

SteveLord

Spaghetti Chuckers are also IT people (or wannabes) that shoot from the hip and try or suggest a bunch of random things with no real logic behind them. If you're in IT and also a gamer, likely a bunch of self proclaimed "experts" in your clan do this all the time.

I do find myself a Fearmonger at times. I am reminded of a Dilbert comic where Alice asks him to fix his computer and he starts to freak, saying that any future problems will automatically be blamed on what he did. Comes with the territory.

erpadmin

CodeBlox wrote: »

Do these really happen? Why toss the blame to someone else? Why would someone want to just toss random ideas hoping something would work?

I have one guy who does exactly that...

I overheard this genius talking to my boss about something he knew nothing about, but yet he was talking out of his ass...the issue wasn't even related to him. When he asked me about this in front of my direct report, I let him have it like no other. He is the type who lives on his knees and it isn't to pray.

To bring this back home to relevance, he actually broke something, it was proven that he broke it, but he would not cop to logging in that server or working on it (of all things, this was an IIS issue...). Between myself and another colleague (I found the root of the problem; the colleague fixed it) it took us 30 minutes to fix where it would have taken one minute had he just copped to what he did. It wasn't like we were going to have firing squad or something, but this type of jerk just wants to appear "perfect"

I will cop to whatever as I usually keep my house in order. Stuff happens, but that's why we have protocol...to enforce the CYA principle...