What's your thoughts on flying to work?

My fiancee just received a position in a city 400+ miles away. It is looking like we will be moving to this new location (we being her and our kids).

I spoke with my boss about this and it seems that we worked out a solution which is flying in on Mondays and flying out on either Thursday end of business or early Friday, like 2-3 hours just so I can synch up with upper management.

Does anybody do this?
What are your thoughts on this situation. I really don't have a better opportunity at the new location. Where I am at now I am learning at a very rapid rate. Like I mentioned several time in other post, my boss and I really click well, not to mention the insane amount of knowledge he shares.

Opinions?

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Xcluziv

N2IT wrote: »

My fiancee just received a position in a city 400+ miles away. It is looking like we will be moving to this new location (we being her and our kids).

I spoke with my boss about this and it seems that we worked out a solution which is flying in on Mondays and flying out on either Thursday end of business or early Friday, like 2-3 hours just so I can synch up with upper management.

Does anybody do this?
What are your thoughts on this situation. I really don't have a better opportunity at the new location. Where I am at now I am learning at a very rapid rate. Like I mentioned several time in other post, my boss and I really click well, not to mention the insane amount of knowledge he shares.

Opinions?

How do you feel about flying week end and week out? Will it start becoming to much of a hassle for you and burnt out? Also, being away from your family will be a big change and are you ready for that? These are just some questions I'm sure you and your wife have discussed.

IMO, if you don't have any other good options at the location you all are moving to you have to do what you have to do. Learning alot and not being stagnant in a position is key to knowledge and advancing in the company.

xenodamus

Honestly, I would enjoy it. I'd love to have a job that let me travel and fly frequently. My wife, on the other hand, is another story.

I think it will ultimately come down to your family dynamics and how the wife feels about it. Happy wife...happy life.

N2IT

Thanks for the replies

Xclu I agree the thought of being away for 3-4 days at a time does sting. But I don't have any other options and between you and me and the fly on the wall I am not quite ready to make a full blown jump into management role over a profit making division or business unit. The financials are coming and I am learning a lot. That's why I am scared to death to leave this position. Infact I won't, I can't, it's career suicide. Plus she has signed off on me staying with my current job.

Xeno part of me loves the idea of having downtime to study accounting, finance and management. Being away from the kids will be tough. But, I will be up there almost every weekend and she and the kids will come down here as well. I have a friend to stay with starting in October who is an single IT professional. He is out of the country 75% of the time and out of pocket another 10%, so I will basically be living in his house alone.

I'll keep you all posted as this plays out.

demonfurbie

i would do it until you can find a different job closer

apoole15

If your wife is ok with it, I'd at least try it out for a couple of months. Discuss with your boss to see if there is potential down the road to work part of the time remotely. Something like 3 weeks in the office and 1 week remotely from your new home with the hope that after a year you'll be able to work 50% of the time remotely.

Get signed up for frequent flyer miles and in a year, take the family somewhere special for a dream vacation.

themagicone

If it's only 400 miles I'd just drive. May be 6-7 hours? By the time you get to the airport, go through security, fly, etc... It'd probably be faster.

erpadmin

I can tell you that every consultant I've worked with does this a lot. Comes to work late on Monday, leaves early on Thursday and will fly back to wherever they live (ID, CA, MA, TX, etc....all to and from NJ). They did this for several months. Only after "go-live" did they get to remote all of their time. Certain cases, they spent a week remoting, but it wasn't all the time.

Whatever you do though, just make sure the love is strong that your own relationship doesn't end. Make sure neither of you gets lonely. Believe me when I tell you that long-distance relationships get old very, very fast.

Turgon

N2IT wrote: »

My fiancee just received a position in a city 400+ miles away. It is looking like we will be moving to this new location (we being her and our kids).

I spoke with my boss about this and it seems that we worked out a solution which is flying in on Mondays and flying out on either Thursday end of business or early Friday, like 2-3 hours just so I can synch up with upper management.

Does anybody do this?
What are your thoughts on this situation. I really don't have a better opportunity at the new location. Where I am at now I am learning at a very rapid rate. Like I mentioned several time in other post, my boss and I really click well, not to mention the insane amount of knowledge he shares.

Opinions?

Difficult. Not a situation to plan for on a purely pragmatic 'how do I juggle relationship and make my meetings' point of view. You need to talk to your boss about homeworking options and follow your wife. Do the majority of your business from that location by email, OCS teleconferences and attend in person for vital gatherings and meetings.

It is not sustainable to be away from your wife and kids week in week out long term. Your wife will struggle without you. You will struggle without them. If you miss personal calls in the evening after a busy day this will add to the stress. When you do finally get home after a power week, exhausted with the airport dash, your wife will need you all weekend and you may be out of gas for all that and quarrel.

Potential marraige breaker Im afraid. Talk to your boss. If he values you he will understand and accomodate your needs.

The potential bomb here is you give everything for the employer, reach a breaking point at home, that then impacts you emotionally, you are less effective at work. You lose the family, then lose the job. Not destined to happen, but certainly a risk. Talk to your boss.

Plantwiz

It would depend on several factors for myself.

1. Who is paying for all this flying? And what circumstances might you be required to stay longer or arrive earlier than 'late' Monday and stay longer than Thursday? How often might this occur.

2. How does your spouse feel about this option?

3. What is the minimum length of time you could do this for you to test it and your spouse to support you (emotionally) during this test? 6 months? a year? Figure out how long you both wish to tolerate this distance living.

4. Where would you stay during your time at the company? (Monday through Thursday) Who pays for this and if you are paying for the rent and/or the flying are you compensated appropriately in salary to justify?

Overall, it can be very doable. It is not a lot different than many Sales positions where you travel all week and return home most weekends. It depends if that is what YOU like (or would like) and your spouse in understanding about this arrangement.

Turgon

Discuss with your boss at home and at work.

N2IT

I appreciate all the great information. We set our timeline for at least the end of the year. Still wouldn't put me at 1 year in this role, but it's a milestone I can shoot for. My boss does value me, at least I believe so and he has told me so. He mentioned on Friday he has seen major improvement in my role in the last 2 months. This is encouraging, infact he was the one looking up flights for me and said that driving was a poor option. I think he is onboard, but I am not sure quite yet.

A couple of proposed scenarios I will submit
1. Fly in Monday, catch a red eye and start work at 8am. Thursday finish the day and fly out that night. Arrive around 7-8 pm and get some rest. Friday through Sunday be at home and spending time with the kids. The car would stay where I work in a paid parking lot. 5 dollars a day with a long term plan. When it's not there I am not getting charged. Forgot to add this would be a 4 x 10 model.

2. Work 5 days a week and fly out on Friday. Not ideal and not something I would like to do.

3. Work Monday through Thursday from the physical location and then work remotely on Friday.

4. Cut my hours to 4 days and 8 hours leaving me with 32 hours a week. Not ideal, but...... it's another option

Quitting is not an option at this point.

I was asked if I would get a raise. Well from a team view point we will be getting a 65,000 dollar raise from my wife/fiancee

I would also recover some of the finances from airline specific credit cards and frequent flyer miles along with my work paying for my flights. My living situation would be with a friend and I would just purchase food and keep the place clean. Again we would set a time frame. We already have a soft agreement of 6 months from October 1st.

I still have 2+ months to prepare for this but it's final. The job my fiancee landed is unbelievable. In IT it would be like a CIS major landing a development job as a C# developer right out the gate or a database adminstrator.

mattlee09

My only addition - Get everything in writing at least if only to make sure it's all out there and agreed upon.

...

From both bosses...

N2IT

mattlee09 wrote: »

From both bosses...

Funny stuff

erpadmin

N2IT wrote: »

I still have 2+ months to prepare for this but it's final. The job my fiancee landed is unbelievable. In IT it would be like a CIS major landing a development job as a C# developer right out the gate or a database adminstrator.

Ummm....you know what, I'm going to forget that I'm a Virgo and just leave that one alone.....especially since I know what you mean anyway.

Listen, from an employer perspective, I don't know if your proposed plan would fly. This begs the question to be asked:

What makes you so special to get a reduced work week when everyone else on your team is still working a full week?

What I'm saying is, why would you, personally, warrant this type of treatment as opposed to your employer's needs and the rest of the people on your team?

You're gonna have to turn to Abraham Lincoln on this one: "A house divided against itself cannot stand."

Three days a week isn't going to cut it, no matter how badly you want it to. You will still have a divided house, my friend. Unfortanately, there will come a time where you will have to decide what's worth more to keep...the job you have now, or your family.

N2IT

erpadmin wrote: »

Ummm....you know what, I'm going to forget that I'm a Virgo and just leave that one alone.....especially since I know what you mean anyway.

Listen, from an employer perspective, I don't know if your proposed plan would fly. This begs the question to be asked:

What makes you so special to get a reduced work week when everyone else on your team is still working a full week?

What I'm saying is, why would you, personally, warrant this type of treatment as opposed to your employer's needs and the rest of the people on your team?

You're gonna have to turn to Abraham Lincoln on this one: "A house divided against itself cannot stand."

Three days a week isn't going to cut it, no matter how badly you want it to. You will still have a divided house, my friend. Unfortanately, there will come a time where you will have to decide what's worth more to keep...the job you have now, or your family.

Restructuring my work schedule to 4 10 hour days isn't really that dramatic. Nor is working a light friday but give more hours to the company during the week. Work 9 and 10s through week and then do a 4 hour day on Friday. Plus not to mention I have been working weekends everyday. Infact I am working on the P&L statement right now along with some billing. I give a lot, I give more than what is required. I think they bite on this and I get my wish. Plus my pay is not exactly astronomical.

erpadmin

N2IT wrote: »

Restructuring my work schedule to 4 10 hour days isn't really that dramatic. Nor is working a light friday but give more hours to the company during the week. Work 9 and 10s through week and then do a 4 hour day on Friday. Plus not to mention I have been working weekends everyday. Infact I am working on the P&L statement right now along with some billing. I give a lot, I give more than what is required. I think they bite on this and I get my wish. Plus my pay is not exactly astronomical.

ERP now the family part you have me. I agree with what you are saying. How sustainable is this? I am hoping sustainable enough to get me through the end of the year to be complete honest.

That makes sense and that can be sold. It'll be up to your bosses (the ones that pay you, not the one at home) if they buy it, but based on what you're presenting, that sounds reasonable.

The only concern you have now is your other boss. You guys really are going to have to do some soul searching for that this to work. Family should always come first before anything.

Just keep Lincoln in mind...

N2IT

erpadmin wrote: »

That makes sense and that can be sold. It'll be up to your bosses (the ones that pay you, not the one at home) if they buy it, but based on what you're presenting, that sounds reasonable.

The only concern you have now is your other boss. You guys really are going to have to do some soul searching for that this to work. Family should always come first before anything.

Just keep Lincoln in mind...

Lincoln is the key brother Lincoln is the key!

Plantwiz

N2IT wrote: »

I appreciate all the great information. We set our timeline for at least the end of the year. .....

Great stuff!

Sounds like you have a good idea of what you want. As mentioned, get it in writting to protect both your employer (and most importantly yourself). It would be reasonable to set a date to review and confirm this situation is still acceptable to both you and your employer (and of course your spouse).

I'd very likely go for it and based on your scenerios, any one of those is reasonable (though I'd like the 4 x 10 myself...particularly if I was younger). You may want to go 3 x 10 with a partial day on Thursday and a partial on Friday remotely...but if 4 x 10 works...take it! (IMO).

Best wishes! Don't rush. Ask questions and be willing to discuss how YOU think it will work for your boss and listen to what HE thinks he wants. Sounds like you have a good boss though!

powerfool

I think that after you do this for a while, which will be difficult... no bones about it, you could likely talk them into remote working of one week per month, and then up to every other week, eventually.

I have talked to my wife about a very similar situation. Currently, my contract is the only work that my company has in my area. There are sometimes some opportunities in nearby locations (with nearby being a 90 minutes one-way drive). However, most of the opportunities are in the DC metro area, which is a 12-hours drive. I am sure I could likely find a colleague that would allow me to crash for a respectable price, so I think that it would workout financially, especially since they will give me a lump sum for "moving" and a COLA adjustment.

I just think that I would only be able to put up with that situation for about a year max, and it would be a miserable year. My wife would never want to live in the metro DC area, even if nothing was tying her down... but she starts her nursing program tomorrow.

Honestly, I need to keep on my toes, though... our client has indicated that they plan on in-sourcing a ton of their work over the next three years. I just cannot imagine that they would be able to offer me anything close to what I am making. If I have to, I guess I would take it and then immediately start looking for something else.

N2IT

powerfool wrote: »

I think that after you do this for a while, which will be difficult... no bones about it, you could likely talk them into remote working of one week per month, and then up to every other week, eventually.

I have talked to my wife about a very similar situation. Currently, my contract is the only work that my company has in my area. There are sometimes some opportunities in nearby locations (with nearby being a 90 minutes one-way drive). However, most of the opportunities are in the DC metro area, which is a 12-hours drive. I am sure I could likely find a colleague that would allow me to crash for a respectable price, so I think that it would workout financially, especially since they will give me a lump sum for "moving" and a COLA adjustment.

I just think that I would only be able to put up with that situation for about a year max, and it would be a miserable year. My wife would never want to live in the metro DC area, even if nothing was tying her down... but she starts her nursing program tomorrow.

Honestly, I need to keep on my toes, though... our client has indicated that they plan on in-sourcing a ton of their work over the next three years. I just cannot imagine that they would be able to offer me anything close to what I am making. If I have to, I guess I would take it and then immediately start looking for something else.

How interesting

My fiancee graduates from her nursing program in August. It took a while but she finally got there. It's excited yet stressful. She blew the HESSE out of the water. I think that's the name of the N-CLEX practice exam. She just has to finish strong in her ethics class and economics. Then of course pass the N-CLEX, which from what I hear is easier than the HESSE.

eansdad

My parents tried something like this back in the early 80s when my dad worked for the LA County jail and we lived in Desert Hot Springs. He worked 3-4 days of doubles and would come home on the week ends. My parents almost divorced, was not a good year. Being away for long stretches will take it's toll. My advice would be do it for now but look for something closer ASAP.

N2IT

eansdad wrote: »

My parents tried something like this back in the early 80s when my dad worked for the LA County jail and we lived in Desert Hot Springs. He worked 3-4 days of doubles and would come home on the week ends. My parents almost divorced, was not a good year. Being away for long stretches will take it's toll. My advice would be do it for now but look for something closer ASAP.

Nothing beats a real world example.

Thanks