Hiring managers, what was the funniest submission you have seen?

One of our HR managers posted a junior Java developer role and a guy applied thinking it was a Starbucks barista job. I face palmed so hard.

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jeremywatts2005

The funniest one I ever got was a really old looking lady who sent a glamour shots with a cigarette in her mouth. To top it off she was a realtor and her resume read like a real estate listing. I used it as an example of what you do not do when you send a resume.

636-555-3226

security job. guy's resume listed in detail every job he'd ever had and full details of each. highlight was when he was a lifeguard in high school and a construction traffic "stop" or "go" guy after college. what that had to do with security i have no idea

dustervoice

Strangest one i've seen was a guy submitted an application for a Helpdesk/ junior networking position we had advertised but had no experience in IT whatsoever. He listed that he was a gardener and mowed lawn and trim flowers for a living but wanted to get into IT. We called him in just to have a laugh. In the end, he was such a nice guy that we ended up offering him the Job as it seemed like he could be a fast learner and we admired his desperation. I guess he was the one that the end of the day who had the last laugh. also, he enhanced our processes so much that he was promoted to Senior network admin within 6 months. This Dude is really a success story. One thing i learned from this experience was always be open minded hence i'm not big on asking technical questions on interviews its more of a personality thing for me.

Mow

dustervoice wrote: »

Strangest one i've seen was a guy submitted an application for a Helpdesk/ junior networking position we had advertised but had no experience in IT whatsoever. He listed that he was a gardener and mowed lawn and trim flowers for a living but wanted to get into IT. We called him in just to have a laugh. In the end, he was such a nice guy that we ended up offering him the Job as it seemed like he could be a fast learner and we admired his desperation. I guess he was the one that the end of the day who had the last laugh. also, he enhanced our processes so much that he was promoted to Senior network admin within 6 months. This Dude is really a success story. One thing i learned from this experience was always be open minded hence i'm not big on asking technical questions on interviews its more of a personality thing for me.

This is an awesome story thanks for sharing it!

cyberguypr

Years ago I remember pulling a resume from the fax machine that looked like a grocery shopping list. One liner at the top with the guy's info and a number of bullets listing jobs and companies, all for janitorial jobs. My educated guess is that it was an older gentleman just spraying resumes to see if anything would stick. I almost called him to help him get a decent resume going.

dustervoice

cyberguypr wrote: »

Years ago I remember pulling a resume from the fax machine that looked like a grocery shopping list. One liner at the top with the guy's info and a number of bullets listing jobs and companies, all for janitorial jobs. My educated guess is that it was an older gentleman just spraying resumes to see if anything would stick. I almost called him to help him get a decent resume going.

maybe he was the same dude we hired

scaredoftests

No way. That is too funny.

scaredoftests

dustervoice wrote: »

Strangest one i've seen was a guy submitted an application for a Helpdesk/ junior networking position we had advertised but had no experience in IT whatsoever. He listed that he was a gardener and mowed lawn and trim flowers for a living but wanted to get into IT. We called him in just to have a laugh. In the end, he was such a nice guy that we ended up offering him the Job as it seemed like he could be a fast learner and we admired his desperation. I guess he was the one that the end of the day who had the last laugh. also, he enhanced our processes so much that he was promoted to Senior network admin within 6 months. This Dude is really a success story. One thing i learned from this experience was always be open minded hence i'm not big on asking technical questions on interviews its more of a personality thing for me.

That is very cool!

ElGato127

dustervoice wrote: »

Strangest one i've seen was a guy submitted an application for a Helpdesk/ junior networking position we had advertised but had no experience in IT whatsoever. He listed that he was a gardener and mowed lawn and trim flowers for a living but wanted to get into IT. We called him in just to have a laugh. In the end, he was such a nice guy that we ended up offering him the Job as it seemed like he could be a fast learner and we admired his desperation. I guess he was the one that the end of the day who had the last laugh. also, he enhanced our processes so much that he was promoted to Senior network admin within 6 months. This Dude is really a success story. One thing i learned from this experience was always be open minded hence i'm not big on asking technical questions on interviews its more of a personality thing for me.

When you say none at all, how do you mean? No certs? No degree? Never touched a computer? Nice of you to take a chance with him. How did he even get through HR?

dustervoice

ElGato127 wrote: »

When you say none at all, how do you mean? No certs? No degree? Never touched a computer? Nice of you to take a chance with him. How did he even get through HR?

He had no certs, degree or corporate experience. He had a PC that he claimed he used to play games that was about it. He got through HR because they weren't really screening resumes they were just forwarding anything they received to us. After seeing it come through we just wanted to have a BIG laugh that Friday evening after Pizza but end up pleasantly surprised.another funny thing as well the dude looked like he had just jumped out of bed and showed up for the interview.

ElGato127

In that case there is hope for me yet.

I was worried that my previous experience in other fields would count against me, despite having transferable skills.

rsutton

There have been many, but one that I remember was actually in an interview. After asking a candidate about their interest in technology, they went on to say, and I quote: "I have a tablet. I’m not proficient with Windows 8. I do not have a smart phone. I do not read tech journals. I don’t watch tech TV but I have seen the iPod. I have a tablet. I used to set up phones at my last job. I know a lot about cloud computing. I know a little bit about it. I’ve been working on my boat. I can do hardware really well. I did not look at your guys web site. I’ve spent most of my time working on my boat for the last two years"

dustervoice

ElGato127 wrote: »

In that case there is hope for me yet. I was worried that my previous experience in other fields would count against me, despite having transferable skills.

Yes a lawnmower is very similar to a PC If you can push a mower, you can also control a mouse

NetworkNewb

rsutton wrote: »

but I have seen the iPod.

lol! If I was interviewing the person and just drank some water before he said that, the water would've been sprayed all over the room! Too funny

CMalon02

dustervoice wrote: »

Strangest one i've seen was a guy submitted an application for a Helpdesk/ junior networking position we had advertised but had no experience in IT whatsoever. He listed that he was a gardener and mowed lawn and trim flowers for a living but wanted to get into IT. We called him in just to have a laugh. In the end, he was such a nice guy that we ended up offering him the Job as it seemed like he could be a fast learner and we admired his desperation. I guess he was the one that the end of the day who had the last laugh. also, he enhanced our processes so much that he was promoted to Senior network admin within 6 months. This Dude is really a success story. One thing i learned from this experience was always be open minded hence i'm not big on asking technical questions on interviews its more of a personality thing for me.

Wow that really cool glad you gave the guy a chance and it paid off!

ITBot

dustervoice wrote: »

Strangest one i've seen was a guy submitted an application for a Helpdesk/ junior networking position we had advertised but had no experience in IT whatsoever. He listed that he was a gardener and mowed lawn and trim flowers for a living but wanted to get into IT. We called him in just to have a laugh. In the end, he was such a nice guy that we ended up offering him the Job as it seemed like he could be a fast learner and we admired his desperation. I guess he was the one that the end of the day who had the last laugh. also, he enhanced our processes so much that he was promoted to Senior network admin within 6 months. This Dude is really a success story. One thing i learned from this experience was always be open minded hence i'm not big on asking technical questions on interviews its more of a personality thing for me.

I love this story! Really shows how your attitude and personalty can go a long way in finding work!

gespenstern

dustervoice wrote: »

Strangest one i've seen was a guy submitted an application for a Helpdesk/ junior networking position we had advertised but had no experience in IT whatsoever. He listed that he was a gardener and mowed lawn and trim flowers for a living but wanted to get into IT. We called him in just to have a laugh. In the end, he was such a nice guy that we ended up offering him the Job as it seemed like he could be a fast learner and we admired his desperation. I guess he was the one that the end of the day who had the last laugh. also, he enhanced our processes so much that he was promoted to Senior network admin within 6 months. This Dude is really a success story. One thing i learned from this experience was always be open minded hence i'm not big on asking technical questions on interviews its more of a personality thing for me.

Damn isn't it a cool story. Now I'm ashamed to share my puny stories, lol

Danielm7

Years ago we brought in a programmer for an interview at a startup I used to work at. His resume looked reasonable enough, nothing scary. He was so nervous he kept rambling and squeezing his fingers together, he pressed them together so hard they were turning colors, at one point I swore his fingers were going to break.

Later in the interview he moved to torturing a purple pen, he was squeezing and bending it in his lap. The pen broke, he got purple ink all over his hands and the carpet, then he denied that it was him...

Oddly enough, even with explaining it to HR, they chose to hire him anyway just based on his resume. We eventually had to let him go, he had been taking assignments/tickets, marking them complete, hiding a paper copy in a drawer, but never actually doing the work, for months...

NetworkNewb

Danielm7 wrote: »

Later in the interview he moved to torturing a purple pen, he was squeezing and bending it in his lap. The pen broke, he got purple ink all over his hands and the carpet, then he denied that it was him...

Wow... I feel awkward for him for just reading about that.

swabbies

We were interviewing a help desk candidate a few years ago. We were asking general questions just to see if he had some familiarity with working in an enterprise. A co-worker of my casually asked him what the network was like at his last job. He replied "Oh man, there were wires EVERYWHERE!". And that is all he had to say about it.

scaredoftests

swabbies wrote: »

We were interviewing a help desk candidate a few years ago. We were asking general questions just to see if he had some familiarity with working in an enterprise. A co-worker of my casually asked him what the network was like at his last job. He replied "Oh man, there were wires EVERYWHERE!". And that is all he had to say about it.

NO WAY! That is the way to prepare for an interview. Hope he counted the number of wires. LOL

techfiend

I haven't been in a position to hire in IT yet. In the auto field I have a few memorable experiences. One that comes to mind is a guy submitted a resume with substantial experience and with the certs we were looking for, which was quite a bit. The initial phone call went so well that I had him in the back of my mind while interviewing others. When he walked in for the interview, the alcohol scent was strong and he could barely open his eyes. I thought of asking him to leave right there but he was communicating well and maybe had lazy eyes, I figured I'd see what comes of it. The interview was going surprisingly well until about 10 minutes in he passes out, falls off the chair and splits his head open on a concrete floor, the amberlamps were called. A few days later he called explaining what happened, alcoholic on a binge, and thought he still had a chance for the job. After I politely explained we've hired someone else, he tried getting compensation for his medical bills, it turned into a frustrating conversation.

Luckily in IT I hope I won't have to deal with such interesting people that are in dire straits.

dustervoice

swabbies wrote: »

He replied "Oh man, there were wires EVERYWHERE!". And that is all he had to say about it.

This is funny

.....next time i'm asked in an interview so how was your security program at your last job? i will say "There were passwords everywhere"

bpenn

techfiend wrote: »

I haven't been in a position to hire in IT yet. In the auto field I have a few memorable experiences. One that comes to mind is a guy submitted a resume with substantial experience and with the certs we were looking for, which was quite a bit. The initial phone call went so well that I had him in the back of my mind while interviewing others. When he walked in for the interview, the alcohol scent was strong and he could barely open his eyes. I thought of asking him to leave right there but he was communicating well and maybe had lazy eyes, I figured I'd see what comes of it. The interview was going surprisingly well until about 10 minutes in he passes out, falls off the chair and splits his head open on a concrete floor, the amberlamps were called. A few days later he called explaining what happened, alcoholic on a binge, and thought he still had a chance for the job. After I politely explained we've hired someone else, he tried getting compensation for his medical bills, it turned into a frustrating conversation.

Luckily in IT I hope I won't have to deal with such interesting people that are in dire straits.

Jesus Christ. I hope he used that experience as motivation to get sober.

E Double U

cyberguypr wrote: »

Years ago I remember pulling a resume from the fax machine that looked like a grocery shopping list. One liner at the top with the guy's info and a number of bullets listing jobs and companies, all for janitorial jobs. My educated guess is that it was an older gentleman just spraying resumes to see if anything would stick. I almost called him to help him get a decent resume going.

I'm still waiting on that call.

techfiend

bpenn wrote: »

Jesus Christ. I hope he used that experience as motivation to get sober.

I hope so too but heavy drinkers are too common in the auto industry. It was the most common cause of termination in my experience and seen it destroy a few lives.

renacido

I've seen applications for senior technical and managerial positions such as IT Program Manager (supervisory project manager), Senior Sys/Net Engineers, IT Managers, etc., from people with 0 experience in anything related whatsoever. Those folks don't ever get interviewed unless there is something special in their resume that screams "potential!!!"

My fave was one my boss received for my current position (Senior Security Engineer) from a school janitor who said he liked the movie "Hackers".

As far as interviews go, technical questions are kind of a waste of time, aside from scenario-based ones that give you insight into their critical thinking, teamwork, decision-making, judgement, attitude toward authority, etc. Behavioral interviewing techniques are very helpful in my experience. Asses their technical competence via validating the data on their resume is accurate by checking their references and verifying their certs. If I'm interviewing for a security manager/architect/engineer job that doesn't require me to stare at packet captures all the livelong day, and I'm asked some arbitrary technical trivia like "here's a whiteboard, diagram a TCP packet header for an XMAS scan in Nmap", I know the hiring manager is probably a trainwreck.

dustervoice

renacido wrote: »

I'm asked some arbitrary technical trivia like "here's a whiteboard, diagram a TCP packet header for an XMAS scan in Nmap", I know the hiring manager is probably a trainwreck.

Strange enough my last interview i was ask to do a very similar thing. In nice words, I basically told the interviewer to go F%$% himself.

OctalDump

renacido wrote: »

As far as interviews go, technical questions are kind of a waste of time, aside from scenario-based ones that give you insight into their critical thinking, teamwork, decision-making, judgement, attitude toward authority, etc. Behavioral interviewing techniques are very helpful in my experience. Asses their technical competence via validating the data on their resume is accurate by checking their references and verifying their certs. If I'm interviewing for a security manager/architect/engineer job that doesn't require me to stare at packet captures all the livelong day, and I'm asked some arbitrary technical trivia like "here's a whiteboard, diagram a TCP packet header for an XMAS scan in Nmap", I know the hiring manager is probably a trainwreck.

Hiring well is just as difficult as any other job, and requires particular skills and training, but too often it's just treated as "Oh, you know what this job is, so you will be fine to hire someone". It's at about the same level as "Oh, you can drive, how about you change out the carburettor on this car".

Usually it won't matter, since your competition is likely to be pretty bad at hiring as well.

But yeah, a good structured interview where you have actually thought about the things that matter for success in the job - all the things, not just technical competence - and where you aim not just be able to evaluate candidates but to compare them to each other and the ideal candidate, is what people need to be aiming for. It gives a better outcome for everyone. It's also a good indication for a candidate when the company hiring them is doing a good job with the hiring process, that maybe they take all their processes seriously.

thomas_

"Oh, you know what this job is, so you will be fine to hire someone"

I had two interviews like that where on of the people on the interview was hired a few months prior. I was thinking "WTF, why are they having someone who was hired just a few months ago interviewing me."