Cover Letter/Resume critique

I am nearly ready to start applying for System Analyst/Network Admin jobs. It's been a while since I've had my cover letter/resume out there and this is the latest version. Please give me some feedback on how professional (or unprofessional) they are in their current state, as well as suggestions for improvement. Thanks!

Resume - critique.doc

CoverLetter - critique.doc

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Comments

AverageJoe

Not bad. Looks pretty professional. A few suggestions:

The recent employment gap will probably raise an eyebrow. You may not want to address it on the resume, but then again, you might. (I know, not much help, right?)

Education doesn't say if you earned a degree. If you did, make it clear. Also, if your GPA was good, put that down too. Especially if no degree was earned, you might want to list a few of the classes that you took that are beneficial to a systems analyst.

With the work experience gap, I'd probably move SKILLS to above WORK EXPERIENCE. That way they'll see what you bring to the table before they notice the gap (hopefully).

But I think the SKILLS list is unruly. I'd shorten it a little ... or maybe just make it two columns. Then maybe add a line or two describing primary duties or key achievements at each company for your work experience. Action and result or scope is a good way to think about it. For example, saying "Microsoft SQL Server 2000/2003 Database Administration" is good, but if you can describe your responsibilities or achievements it gives a better idea of your capabilities. Maybe something like: Managed 2100 user accounts in Microsoft SQL Server environment; provided both in-house client-server and external web interfaces; ensured on-site and off-site backups; created disaster recovery plan from scratch; improved system reliability and lauded by CIO as "top system administrator"

Just my 2 cents.
Best of luck!

metalone4

Thanks so much! I didn't earn a degree while in school. It was a technical trade school, but the MCSE program and didn't offer a degree. Most jobs I'm looking at seem to require a degree, so I'm a bit nervous that I'll be disqualified since I don't have one.

The gap is due to several reasons, but mainly due to a disability, as well as looking after my elderly father. I'm also taking the opportunity to obtain certifications in AWS and Server 2012. I will not deny the disability if it's brought up, but I hesitate to mention it since it could be looked at as a liability.

I'll rework the Skills section as you noted, I like your suggestions.

Thanks again!

AverageJoe

If you completed the program you could probably say something like "Earned undergraduate certificate in Computer Networking" or "Earned School Name Certificate in Computer Networking" ... just something to show you completed the program.

Yes, it's hard to get past HR if they're requiring a degree. Sometimes they allow experience as a substitute, but not always. I've even heard of a case where someone was offered a job then HR realized he didn't have the required degree and they had to rescind the offer. The manager wanted to hire him anyway, but HR wouldn't allow it.

I agree with not putting anything about the disability on your resume. Personally, if I were interviewing you and you mentioned you took some time away from work to take care of your father, I'd understand that completely. Many of us have faced similar struggles, whether we actually took time off or not.

Best of luck!

metalone4

AverageJoe wrote: »

If you completed the program you could probably say something like "Earned undergraduate certificate in Computer Networking" or "Earned School Name Certificate in Computer Networking" ... just something to show you completed the program.

Yes, it's hard to get past HR if they're requiring a degree. Sometimes they allow experience as a substitute, but not always. I've even heard of a case where someone was offered a job then HR realized he didn't have the required degree and they had to rescind the offer. The manager wanted to hire him anyway, but HR wouldn't allow it.

I agree with not putting anything about the disability on your resume. Personally, if I were interviewing you and you mentioned you took some time away from work to take care of your father, I'd understand that completely. Many of us have faced similar struggles, whether we actually took time off or not.

Best of luck!

I've updated the resume per your suggestions; it's already looking better. Thanks!