Post your craziest caffeine stories!

Just a fun thread to read some entertaining responses of some crazy things we have seen in the workplace....

I'll go first...

1.) Once watched a guy at a previous job make a pot of coffee replacing the water with previously brewed coffee!! Double coffee!!

2.) Once watched a guy from same previous job (could have been the same guy) make a "cup" (had to be 30oz+ container) filled with individual espresso shots. These espresso shots were made from a universal coffee maker machine that accepted the individual packets of different coffee or tea flavors. The espresso made like 3-4oz of espresso per packet. So needless to say he would run through the entire stash making his "cup of joe" in the morning and would piss everybody off as he would be literally standing in front of the machine for a solid 20mins doing this.

What kind of horror Caffeine stories do you have (not limited to Coffee episodes)?

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jcundiff

In late 90s/early 2000s, walmart carried a caffiene enhanced water (Water Joe) which we used to make coffee/espresso with at work

Fulcrum45

Nothing real crazy but when I was in college I was under the misconception that caffeine can make up for lack of sleep. It doesn't. 40 hours and 12 No-Doz later and I'm in this semi-lucid half awake state on the 10 story of our college library with my face in a book. Too tired to function but too caffeinated to sleep. At least it wasn't Finals Week. Oh wait, it was. Awful.

Danielh22185

Fulcrum45 wrote: »

Nothing real crazy but when I was in college I was under the misconception that caffeine can make up for lack of sleep. It doesn't. 40 hours and 12 No-Doz later and I'm in this semi-lucid half awake state on the 10 story of our college library with my face in a book. Too tired to function but too caffeinated to sleep. At least it wasn't Finals Week. Oh wait, it was. Awful.

haha! Yes I have been there before. Dangerous stuff to do to your body!

ITSec14

About 5 years ago, I was working full time and attending college at night. Finals were coming up and I also had about 75 pages worth of papers to write in 5 days.

Bought one of those Costco sized energy shot boxes and pretty much drank half of them within a week. I'm actually really surprised I didn't OD on caffeine.

ITSpectre

I used to work with a guy that had to have the biggest cup of coffee in the mornings... he would brew a whole pot and then divide it between two BIG cups!!! It got worse when the office got a Keurig machine... he would use almost all the K-cups in the office to fill up his two big cups.
Needless to say he eventually had to buy his own coffee machine and keep it near his desk... His manager was tired of him doing that and just bought him his own coffee maker.

Bokeh

Had a network infratstructure manager who would go through 4 Quad-Shot expressos every day. Doc told him to lay off the Red Bull and other energy drinks to save his heart, told him to switch to coffee. Well ....

He would be wired till 2am the following morning, get up at 6 and start the day the same way. The occasional 6-shooter if he was having a rough day as well.

ITSpectre

I also used to work/live with a guy that drank 6 Monster low carb energy drinks a day. 2 in the morning, 2 in the afternoon, and 2 at night. he was high strung and hard to live/work with.

JoJoCal19

No real crazy stories, but at the end of a week of waking up at 5am to study I was so tired that I woke up, had one of the big boy 24oz Lo-Carb Monsters, read for 20 minutes and wasn't retaining anything so I laid back down and slept for 3 more hours. I'm definitely not sensitive to caffeine lol.

ITSpectre wrote: »

I also used to work/live with a guy that drank 6 Monster low carb energy drinks a day. 2 in the morning, 2 in the afternoon, and 2 at night. he was high strung and hard to live/work with.

Heh. At my most intense study periods I only ever did 1x1x1 Lo-Carb Monsters in those same timeframes.

wd40

When I was 22, I used to work until 4 and then go to university from 5 to 9

At that day I had a headache and a final exam.

And I was in a supplements are good for your brain phase (taking guarana and ginkgo biloba supplements)

I had a redbull and 4 shots of espresso at work, went to university had a 2 espressos and a sugar free redbull.

finished the exam some how and went home.
I could not sleep for 2 days after that.

now I am a semi daily morning redbull guy, it makes me happy "really it makes me a funny person" I know it is bad but it is better than smoking or doing drugs

NetworkNewb

ITSpectre wrote: »

I also used to work/live with a guy that drank 6 Monster low carb energy drinks a day. 2 in the morning, 2 in the afternoon, and 2 at night. he was high strung and hard to live/work with.

Damn, that sounds digusting! lol

I used have a red bull almost everyday and did that for awhile. When I quit I got insane migraines for a week or 2. Not getting on that train again!

shochan

This one time at band camp........

Queue

Pulled up to a gas station to gas up for a cross country road trip (east-to-west coast). There was a guy with a tent in the parking lot slinging something called Speed marketed by Robby Gordon (a Nascar driver). We mentioned the trip and he said if we bought a case inside the store he would give us 3. So we bought one case and were subsequently given 3 more cases for a total of 4 cases. The next two weeks I'm not sure how many I drank, but we drove for 21 hours straight from Newport beach to Austin Texas. Furthest I've driven or will ever do again, but I can say I've done it.

We have an auto-fill coffee maker at work, I'm sure you all have seen the type. You put in the pack of coffee with filter and push a button and it does all the water for you. Well for whatever reason, the top of those things still have access to put water in. I'm sure you see where I'm going. Some kid fills the water and presses the all good to go button. Within minutes the pot is full but is still dispensing water (twice the amount) and completely floods the counter and break room cabinets/floor.

Danielh22185

ITSpectre wrote: »

I also used to work/live with a guy that drank 6 Monster low carb energy drinks a day. 2 in the morning, 2 in the afternoon, and 2 at night. he was high strung and hard to live/work with.

Good god! 6 a day!? That guy is not going to live long!

ITSpectre

Danielh22185 wrote: »

Good god! 6 a day!? That guy is not going to live long!

I know.... I can only drink 1 a day if that.

TechGromit

I sometimes take 1/2 a 5 hour energy drink when driving, and wash it down with water, since I read it's bad for your teeth. I've noticed they have less of an effect on me than they used to, proably too much caffeine intake.

stryder144

In one of my military schools we had an instructor that drank three 8 cup pots of coffee a day. One before work, one in the morning, and one in the afternoon.

I once drank a cup or two of coffee while popping a No-doze. Got to work (night shift) and popped a second No-doze (less than an hour later) while drinking a Mt Dew. When the caffeine hit I started to get motion sick while reading a book...

UnixGuy

Not a crazy story, but my (ex) boss kept telling me that people who drink black coffee are psychopaths/serial killers. I drink straight strong black coffees..2/3 a day

i stare back at him and tell him he has nothing to worry about....I then wink.

powerfool

I was at Starbucks and used my Star Rewards to get a free drink... so I ordered I think a Venti Hazlenut Macchiato with a total of 6 shots of espresso. They accidentally made a Venti Caramel Macchiato with 6 shots of espresso... realized it, made my correct drink and gave them both to me for free. I drank them both in about 10 minutes... and these weren't my first coffees of the day (I had a cup or two of brewed coffee at home before heading up to Starbucks... starting to sound like those people that get drunk before heading to the bar).

Anyhow, I think that I had enough caffeine that I could see new colors.

@UnixGuy - Yeah, I do black coffee from my french press these days. Takes a really good coffee and can't be too bitter, but when it is right, it is the best... plus, no significant calories. It is part of my new intermittent fasting diet routine.

UnixGuy

powerfool wrote: »

I was at Starbucks and used my Star Rewards to get a free drink... so I ordered I think a Venti Hazlenut Macchiato with a total of 6 shots of espresso. They accidentally made a Venti Caramel Macchiato with 6 shots of espresso... realized it, made my correct drink and gave them both to me for free. I drank them both in about 10 minutes... and these weren't my first coffees of the day (I had a cup or two of brewed coffee at home before heading up to Starbucks... starting to sound like those people that get drunk before heading to the bar).

Anyhow, I think that I had enough caffeine that I could see new colors.

@UnixGuy - Yeah, I do black coffee from my french press these days. Takes a really good coffee and can't be too bitter, but when it is right, it is the best... plus, no significant calories. It is part of my new intermittent fasting diet routine.

Dude that's a lot of caffeine!! too much for your heart!

Starbucks isn't popular here...they take coffee making to an art here. Black coffee ftw, and it kicks your metabolism and full of antioxidants! I don't fast anymore

kurosaki00

Danielh22185 wrote: »

Just a fun thread to read some entertaining responses of some crazy things we have seen in the workplace....

I'll go first...

1.) Once watched a guy at a previous job make a pot of coffee replacing the water with previously brewed coffee!! Double coffee!!

He basically percolated the coffee. Which tastes like sh1t. Also, clogs the machine unless done in a percolator.

kurosaki00

Bokeh wrote: »

Had a network infratstructure manager who would go through 4 Quad-Shot expressos every day. Doc told him to lay off the Red Bull and other energy drinks to save his heart, told him to switch to coffee. Well ....

Wait... he had 4 espresso shots? wtf? So he had 4x4 = 16 espresso shots? Thats a lot of caffeine... after around 500-800mg of caffeine you start getting into dangerous territory. An espresso shot has around 150.

kurosaki00

Dont really have coffee stories;however, avid coffee drinker.
Recently got me a Gaggia espresso machine and I love it. I drink around 2 shots of espresso daily and on weekend I drink 2-6 shots throughout the day. On my free days I like to have a macchiato (legit macchiato, not starbucks definition of macchiato), a few times throughout the day.

Also, espresso has less caffeine than blonder coffee. The more coffee is roasted the more it losses its caffeine. Espresso is strong because of it's roasting, not the caffeine. Espresso is more thick and strong in taste, losses the fruit flavor and in exchange we taste methods of roasting (fire/wood fire/sun/etc). So actually that watered down blondie stuff you buy at starbucks has way more caffeine.

ITSpectre

kurosaki00 wrote: »

Dont really have coffee stories;however, avid coffee drinker.
Recently got me a Gaggia espresso machine and I love it. I drink around 2 shots of espresso daily and on weekend I drink 2-6 shots throughout the day. On my free days I like to have a macchiato (legit macchiato, not starbucks definition of macchiato), a few times throughout the day.

Also, espresso has less caffeine than blonder coffee. The more coffee is roasted the more it losses its caffeine. Espresso is strong because of it's roasting, not the caffeine. Espresso is more thick and strong in taste, losses the fruit flavor and in exchange we taste methods of roasting (fire/wood fire/sun/etc). So actually that watered down blondie stuff you buy at starbucks has way more caffeine.

So can I call you "coffee guru"??

But on the real. What is a good strong coffee?? I like bold coffee that will make you wake up when you drink it. Not this watered down stuff. How much did you pay for your espresso machine? And can you even get strong coffee from the store or you have to go to a certain place

scaredoftests

Where I work there is a Kuerig on each floor!
I usually wear my coffee and it seems to happen when I am wearing light colors.

kurosaki00

ITSpectre wrote: »

So can I call you "coffee guru"??

But on the real. What is a good strong coffee?? I like bold coffee that will make you wake up when you drink it. Not this watered down stuff. How much did you pay for your espresso machine? And can you even get strong coffee from the store or you have to go to a certain place

If you want more caffeine get medium or blonde roasts. However, flavor will be more "fruity" and body will be more watery. The lighter the roast, the more taste of the fruit/tree/soil and less body. The fresher, the better.
I dont know your area but here, in downtown, there are tons of coffee places that import their beans and roast them. They will grind them for you (made to order).
In the long run getting your own grinder and buying beans online is cheaper.
Buying pre-ground coffee is cheaper when done online.
I usually go for dark roast espresso grounds. Some of my favs are Illy dark roast, Lavazza tierra and espresso, La Llave. (two italians and one cuban).
I've seen Lavazza and Illy in Krogers. Pilon is fairly good and also seen it in the local supermarkets. I buy my coffee through amazon.

Strong and thick coffee, you can try Turkish coffee. It's pretty bold in flavor and thick. My espresso machine cost around $350
Walmart sells a Mr. Coffee ECMP1000 for like a hundred bucks. Makes pretty good coffee from pre-grounds. It's a great starter for drinking better coffee.

redsteel

powerfool wrote: »

I was at Starbucks and used my Star Rewards to get a free drink... so I ordered I think a Venti Hazlenut Macchiato with a total of 6 shots of espresso. They accidentally made a Venti Caramel Macchiato with 6 shots of espresso... realized it, made my correct drink and gave them both to me for free. I drank them both in about 10 minutes... and these weren't my first coffees of the day (I had a cup or two of brewed coffee at home before heading up to Starbucks... starting to sound like those people that get drunk before heading to the bar).

Anyhow, I think that I had enough caffeine that I could see new colors.

@UnixGuy - Yeah, I do black coffee from my french press these days. Takes a really good coffee and can't be too bitter, but when it is right, it is the best... plus, no significant calories. It is part of my new intermittent fasting diet routine.

Um . . . wow. I accidentally ordered an Americano (I think) and added a shot. I thought it was coffee and milk or something. He puts it on the counter and yells "5 shot Americano" and I was like, oh crap what have I done. But I paid like a jillion dollars for it so of course I drank it. I couldn't even finish it and I have a pretty high tolerance to caffeine.
I can't imagine drinking 6 shots with however many others you drank. I'm surprised you didn't have an aneurysm given what your blood pressure probably was!

Oh and once, I was telling my coffee buddy about instant coffee and you just mix these crystals in water and it will give you a quick fix. I probably gave him about a pots worth, but forgot to tell him how much water to mix it in. He put it all in 1 cup. He couldn't drive home that afternoon, he was too crazy. Whoops.

ITSpectre

kurosaki00 wrote: »

If you want more caffeine get medium or blonde roasts. However, flavor will be more "fruity" and body will be more watery. The lighter the roast, the more taste of the fruit/tree/soil and less body. The fresher, the better.
I dont know your area but here, in downtown, there are tons of coffee places that import their beans and roast them. They will grind them for you (made to order).
In the long run getting your own grinder and buying beans online is cheaper.
Buying pre-ground coffee is cheaper when done online.
I usually go for dark roast espresso grounds. Some of my favs are Illy dark roast, Lavazza tierra and espresso, La Llave. (two italians and one cuban).
I've seen Lavazza and Illy in Krogers. Pilon is fairly good and also seen it in the local supermarkets. I buy my coffee through amazon.

Strong and thick coffee, you can try Turkish coffee. It's pretty bold in flavor and thick. My espresso machine cost around $350
Walmart sells a Mr. Coffee ECMP1000 for like a hundred bucks. Makes pretty good coffee from pre-grounds. It's a great starter for drinking better coffee.

Thank you sir!

DatabaseHead

+1 Kuro

I grind my beans everyday and then use a Chemex or Aeropress and the coffee comes out amazing.

the_Grinch

I'm a big coffee guy (cut out my 2 to 4 Monster's a day habit) and a buddy is turning me into a coffee snob. Getting a hand cranked grinder and a sifter to make the perfect cup.