Might as well through my resume in the fire

I had this done professorially about 6 months ago. It got me 5 call backs in the week after I got it but now it's basically hasn't helped at all. This is the CV I send out with most of my applications:



If the information on (insert source) is still accurate, then you are currently seeking to fill the position of a (insert job title). This letter is to introduce myself as a candidate for just such a position. I am a skilled and qualified professional with a background in diverse aspects of electronics and technology. My objective is to pursue a career in the field of electronics and technology with an organization that offers opportunities for growth and advancement. I want to utilize my extensive knowledge and expertise to the fullest potential. My resume highlights my professional accomplishments including:

 Strong leadership capability, able to quickly assess client and company needs.
 Proven electrical engineering and network administration abilities.
 Acute design, repair, and testing skills.
 Exceptional computer system knowledge.

Currently I’m enrolled in a BS degree in IT with an emphasis on security and networking. I just received my first IT Certifications, the CIW Associates, CompTIA A+ and CompTIA Security+. Within the next month I’ll have my Network + certification from CompTIA and 70-640 (Windows 7 Configuration) also. I’m looking at getting my Cisco CCNA by February. My projected graduation date for school is Oct 2013, but may be much sooner. As an employee, you will find me to be easily adaptable to different environments. I am a team player dedicated to the growth and success of the organization as a whole. Given my track record of success, I believe I can bring a high level of expertise and experience to this position. Salary can be discussed in further discussions. The enclosed resume briefly outlines my experience and accomplishments. If it appears that my qualifications meet your current needs, I would be happy to further discuss my background in a meeting with you. Please feel free to contact me at ### or by replying to this email address.

Sincerely.

Jonathan Gustafson
Courses Completed at WGU: JIT2, LYT2, TFT2, SJT2, BFC2, TGT2, FXT2
Courses Required For Me To Graduate WGU in MS: IT Network Managment: MCT2, LZT2, MBT1, MDT2, MNT2
CU Done this term: 16 Total CU Done: 19
Currently working on: Nothing Graduation Goal: 5/2013

Comments

  • rogue2shadowrogue2shadow Member Posts: 1,501 ■■■■■■■■□□
    I like the format. I would put the technical skills up with the "Areas of expertise". Definitely put the clearance level in your summary and your military service higher up. Make sure the bordering you use on the first page carries on to the second and third etc. You could place your languages in the summary as well (noticed it catches eyes faster :)). When you have more IT certifications, I would probably put that section closer to the "Area of Expertise" section but the rest I think looks good. Thats all I got for now.
  • erpadminerpadmin Member Posts: 4,165 ■■■■■■■■■■
    Your resume is a one page resume that is two pages. Sometime before I start LUT1 (maybe while I'm still at work), I will see what I can do to advise/show an example. But in the quick scan that I did, I did see a one pager masquerading as a two pager.

    I will get back to this though. :)
  • ClaymooreClaymoore Member Posts: 1,637
    Critiques on resumes and cover letters are a mix of fact (or standards) and opinion. I will cover the facts first and the opinions in another post so you can skip the opinions and not be as upset.

    First, spelling and grammar.

    'Through my resume'? You should use the present perfect tense 'have thrown.

    'Professorially done'? Never mind that "the road to hell is paved with adverbs" (Stephen King), but I assume you mean professionally. Firefox has a built-in spell checker for message boards, and I hope you use the one built in to whatever product you use to create your resume and cover letter.

    Contractions shouldn't be used in formal writing (but I can get away with it hereicon_razz.gif). You should definitely (bad adverb) replace all the 'I'm' with 'I am' and 'I'll' with 'I will'.

    Advice - check out Eats, Shoots and Leaves or The Elements of Style to improve your business writing. Many people may not notice or care about these little grammatical issues, but those of us who do notice care a great deal about them.

    Next, incorrect information:
    The 70-640 exam is the 2008 Active Directory exam, not the Windows 7 Configuration exam, which is 70-680.
  • erpadminerpadmin Member Posts: 4,165 ■■■■■■■■■■
    Claymoore wrote: »
    Critiques on resumes and cover letters are a mix of fact (or standards) and opinion. I will cover the facts first and the opinions in another post so you can skip the opinions and not be as upset.

    First, spelling and grammar.

    'Through my resume'? You should use the present perfect tense 'have thrown.

    Tense isn't even the issue....it's not even the correct "throw".... :) then you could deal with tense....

    thrown, threw, throw.....
  • ClaymooreClaymoore Member Posts: 1,637
    Finally, opinion.

    Your cover letter reads like a bad form letter. I think a cover letter should be used to convey why you are the best candidate for this postion. Reference the job posting and explain how you meet the requirements. Try to act as if this were the one perfect position for which you have been waiting rather than just another posting to which you clicked 'Apply Now'. The recruiters get plenty of blind submissions so use a cover letter to stand out. Then rely on the qualifications and experience in your resume to back up your cover letter.

    I am not a fan of listing 'in progress' certifications on a resume. You can get away with them in a cover letter if they pertain to this particular job posting. You list Network+, 640/680, and CCNA as targets for the next few months. Are these requirements or preferences for the position? If it is a networking job they may not care that you are pursuing a desktop OS certification.

    I would not bring up salary in a cover letter. Salary has little bearing as to whether you are the right candidate for this job.

    Your cover letter also sounds too passive. Phrases like 'if the information is still accurate' and 'if it appears my qualifications meet' just give them an excuse to toss your resume. Use active voice and clear, concise sentences to express your ideas.
  • ClaymooreClaymoore Member Posts: 1,637
    erpadmin wrote: »
    Tense isn't even the issue....it's not even the correct "throw".... :) then you could deal with tense....

    thrown, threw, throw.....

    True, but a spelling check would not catch it. The sentence "I might as well through my resume in the fire instead of submitting it" passes grammatical muster in Word 2007. If you know to use the correct tense then maybe you do not use a homonym by mistake. This is also why you need someone else to proofread your writing.
  • SyntaxSyntax Member Posts: 61 ■■■□□□□□□□
    Claymoore wrote: »
    True, but a spelling check would not catch it. The sentence "I might as well through my resume in the fire instead of submitting it" passes grammatical muster in Word 2007. If you know to use the correct tense then maybe you do not use a homonym by mistake. This is also why you need someone else to proofread your writing.

    I think he was trying to use the correct tense (throw). He spelled through probably because he was thinking of though and the pronunciation of that word. Darn the English language. :P
  • Mojo_666Mojo_666 Member Posts: 438
    Comments on CV's as a rule IMO are all complete crap, what one person thinks is a good CV another thinks is trash, keep it as short as you can while containing the most relevant and readable info you can, most agencies will re hash it into one of their own templates anyway.

    The rest comes down to the current market I’m afraid.

    I have been doing this for 12 years, I have maybe submitted 50-60 different CV's following other peoples advice, my own ideas and opinions of friends but truth be told the market dictates how many calls I get and the interviews get me the jobs.


    Blaming your CV is just a reason, you might well be excluded because of the wrong format or wrong font but really who cares? Do you want to work for someone who throws your CV in the bin because of the font you use or layout? even if that happens? Screw that crap, I have looked at many a CV and it comes down 2 things.

    CV = do they have the experience?

    Interview = are they talking crap?

    Anything else is just HR horse poo, every CV I read from the sme source looks the same and I have never excluded one on any reason like format, font layout etc etc, would I not been a complete dumbass if I did? artits and writers do formating, techies? LOLTOTHEFUCKINGL.


    I have looked at loads of CV threads here and every single one contains something I think is cool, 10 things I think is crap, 10 opinions that support mine, 10 that do not, and 20 that make me feel like shooting myself in the balls and claiming benefits rather than working for a living.


    OK I exaggerated a little in regards to the threads here but still do not believe the hype about CV’s not a single post on these boards or any "PRO" CV website has made me re write my CV.
  • erpadminerpadmin Member Posts: 4,165 ■■■■■■■■■■
    Claymoore wrote: »
    True, but a spelling check would not catch it. The sentence "I might as well through my resume in the fire instead of submitting it" passes grammatical muster in Word 2007. If you know to use the correct tense then maybe you do not use a homonym by mistake. This is also why you need someone else to proofread your writing.

    I wouldn't understand how that would pass grammatical muster by anyone when "through" (by itself) isn't even a verb.

    I get what you're saying though, as tense would make sense if he'd have said "I might as well threw my resume in the fire instead of submitting it." However, I would hope by then he'd have caught that and this discussion wouldn't have even happened. icon_lol.gif

    I dunno...this kinda reminds me of another TE conversation a couple of days back about folks from all of the US (or even in my own state) that have learned different things at different speeds at different school systems (be it public, or parochial). This is all stuff I learned in grammar school. I'm nowhere near an English major, and I'm sure I've littered TE with some typos, misspelled words, etc.

    That's why I usually let stuff like this go...I would have continued doing so had you also pointed out the homonym. :)
  • petedudepetedude Member Posts: 1,510
    Claymoore wrote: »
    Advice - check out Eats, Shoots and Leaves or The Elements of Style to improve your business writing. Many people may not notice or care about these little grammatical issues, but those of us who do notice care a great deal about them.

    Amen. . . from a fellow nitpicker.
    Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
    --Will Rogers
  • themagiconethemagicone Member Posts: 674
    My big problem is that I write(type) faster than I think. So in quick writings, like a post, I end up with stupid little errors - I.e. throw vs though. That is why I rarely change my resume or cover letter, I know it has been written right. I also have a hard catching my own mistakes, I could read something I wrote 10 times and not catch something simple.
    Courses Completed at WGU: JIT2, LYT2, TFT2, SJT2, BFC2, TGT2, FXT2
    Courses Required For Me To Graduate WGU in MS: IT Network Managment: MCT2, LZT2, MBT1, MDT2, MNT2
    CU Done this term: 16 Total CU Done: 19
    Currently working on: Nothing Graduation Goal: 5/2013
  • erpadminerpadmin Member Posts: 4,165 ■■■■■■■■■■
    As promised, I decided to give this a look before I started LUT1. Here's my suggestions.

    1) I always recommend that an IT resume should be just that: an IT resume. Everything else is just stuff that HR just won't care about. The ONLY exception to this is your military experience. (Companies get a nice tax break for hiring military veterans). You should tailor your resume to make it relevant to your IT experience and/or how it can used in IT. (Example, minus the meat packaging stuff)

    2) I would try to shorten this to one page. You can combine your areas of expertise with skills.

    3) In education, minus auto mechanics, but leave the Air Force stuff there.

    4) I would leave off the language skills. Some companies may care for it, but if they're not asking for it, leave it out.

    That's about all I got right now.
  • superman859superman859 Member Posts: 55 ■■□□□□□□□□
    I'm no resume expert, but from what I've heard and in my personal opinion, don't worry about it being two pages / one page / etc.

    Someone earlier mentioned it was a one-pager as a two-pager, but I don't see that as an issue. The issue would be is everything related to the job you are applying for - does the meat packaging job relate enough? If so, leave it. If it's not really related, remove it.

    As long as the resume is concise and only contains related, useful information, I wouldn't worry too much about the length. Personally, my current resume is at 3 pages, but I think I can justify all the information that is on it for the jobs I will be applying for. More important stuff is placed near the top, and less important (but still important and relevant) stuff is placed lower.

    From my past experience, interviewers will look over it, bold headings, and look more into specifics for parts they are more interested in for possible questions / further inquiries. At my past interview, one of my previous jobs wasn't directly related but relevant enough, but that was actually the one he was most interested in hearing more about (as opposed to a couple others I thought he would be more interested in). It would have been a shame to leave it off just to shorten the resume.

    However, I do agree with comments regarding the body of the email / cover letter / application. It sounds (and looks in this case) exactly like a template where you (plug word here). Boring. Personally, I think this part should vary for each job you apply for and be much more specific than your example. The key is to get them to open the resume and read it, but if it sounds like a template, they may never even make it to the resume.

    I'd also leave off future certifications unless they are relevant / required and truly in the near future (within the next month or so). Otherwise, my cover letters would look something like "I also intend to receive CEH, MCSE, CISSP, CCNA, CCSP, OSCP, and perhaps a few others within the next year." icon_smile.gif Of course, I may intend to do that, but I can almost guarantee it's not going to happen. I'll still try though! icon_smile.gif
    Degrees: B.S. Computer Science, B.S. Mathematics

    Certifications: Network+, Security+

    In-Progress: M.S. Computer Science, CEH
  • tpatt100tpatt100 Member Posts: 2,991 ■■■■■■■■■□
    I have changed my resume every couple of years, I see somebody else's and I like the format and I borrow the format for my resume.

    Now a days I think keywords matter the most.
  • neocybeneocybe Member Posts: 79 ■■□□□□□□□□
    I'll apologize in advance if I come across condescending, I'm in the same boat.

    In my opinion I would shrink your cover letter dramatically.

    1) eliminate the rundown of certifications and graduation dates, these should be in either the Certifications section or Qualifications area of your resume.

    2) move your bullet points to your resume objective

    3) try not to bounce back and forth between formal language and more casual language.

    ex. - "I will receive my CCNA In February" instead of "I am looking to get my CCNA by February"

    I usually send a quick two or three sentence cover letter with my resume which has worked for years (at least in my area of the globe)

    example:

    To Whom it may concern, (or if you can decipher the persons name form the advertisement use that.)


    I am forwarding my resume in response to your recent advertisement seeking skilled xyz on (what ever source). I believe my professional experience and diverse skill set are an ideal combination for success in this positions. (insert why: ex. specific experience, mastery of a particular skill that appears needed) I can be reached at xxx-xxx-xxxx to discuss my qualifications and schedule an interview.

    Thank you for your time and consideration,


    Sincerely,

    Daffy Duck.


    Try to make your approach more direct to the particular position and be persuasive. The last sentence may appear cocky but it lets the reader know you are serious and have already scoped out a parking space; not to mention you are setting the pace, not the other way around.
  • earweedearweed Member Posts: 5,192 ■■■■■■■■■□
    I have to agree with Erpadmin as to this being a one page resume written to fill two pages. The first page has a lot of paragraph content where bullet points should be. Also it should be aimed at IT. The second page is basically a lot of white space and if you are more concise and include mostly relevant info then you would have a one page resume.
    What type of jobs are you aiming for? If it is more field engineer jobs then the content will probably work. You have it set up really well if you are aiming to stay a field engineer. I tend to have the impression you may be wanting something more than that eventually though so you should probably aim to shift your content somewhat to show your true worth as an IT employee.
    Your skills and experience seem to be very wide and far reaching and you would probably not get interest for anyting such as a Jr. Sys Admin or NOC job if that is the type of job you are aiming at. They would look at this and automatically pigeon-hole you as a Field Engineer.
    As for the cover letter I don't really think it is that bad. I probably wouldn't point out the rapidity with which you are receiving your certifications but just that you have them. Bullet points are also not a good idea in a cover letter,IMHO, as they should be in the resume only. You want to grab their attention about your interest in the position with the cover letter, not flood them with information. 2 concise well written paragraphs should do it.
    Just my $.02
    No longer work in IT. Play around with stuff sometimes still and fix stuff for friends and relatives.
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