Please critique my resume (again) and cover letter.

CenturionMarioCenturionMario Member Posts: 82 ■■■□□□□□□□
I made a post about 5 months ago about a resume critique. So far, after about 200 job submissions and about 3 physical interviews (and maybe a few more phone interviews), I think there might be a problem.

I'm well aware that I don't have a Bachelors Degree (plan to get that once I get a job), much experience, or major certifications (plan to re-take the Windows 70-680 exam at the end of this month or early next month). Right now, I want to focus on things that I can control.

I tried to attach my resume, but this forum doesn't seem to accept docx files.

Here is my resume (The layout doesn't come out the way I would like it to):

[FONT=&quot]FIRST (INI) LAST[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]1234 56th Ave W. City, State ZIPCODE [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot](612) 867-5309 [/FONT][FONT=&quot]e-mail@email.com[/FONT]
___________________________________________________________________________________
[FONT=&quot]SUMMARY[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]A dedicated and dependable IT professional seeking a challenging and rewarding help desk or desktop support position.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]EDUCATION[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]MINNEAPOLIS COMMUNITY and TECHNICAL COLLEGE (MCTC)[/FONT][FONT=&quot] Minneapolis, MN[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]2 years of general education credits 08/2005 – 12/2010 [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]
CERTIFICATIONS[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]
o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]CompTIA A+[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]CompTIA Network+[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]CompTIA Security+[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

SOFTWARE SKILLS[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]

o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]OPERATING SYSTEMS:[/FONT][FONT=&quot] Windows 2000/XP/VISTA/7[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]SOFTWARE: [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Microsoft Office 2003/2007, ESET NOD32 Antivirus, Spybot Search and Destroy, [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Internet Explorer, Mozilla Firefox, Google Chrome[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE[/FONT]


[FONT=&quot]UNITED PARCEL SERVICE [/FONT][FONT=&quot] Minneapolis, MN [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Package Sorter[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 10/2008 – Present[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Memorize all the zip code sorts from the United States and the territories of Canada.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Work as part of a busy team to ensure safe and efficient loading of packages.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Assist co-workers in sorting packages when they are backed up, so they can get caught up to a normal pace.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]ATLAS HOME HEALTHCARE INC. [/FONT][FONT=&quot] Brooklyn Center, MN [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Technical Support[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 08/2009 – 06/2010[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Installed phone lines, computers, software, and Linksys wireless network.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Programmed PBX phone system for 3 telephones to respond to inside and outside calls.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Troubleshot computer, wireless connectivity, and printer problems.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Configured and maintained anti-malware applications, such as ESET NOD32 Antivirus.[/FONT][FONT=&quot]

VOLUNTEER EXPERIENCE[/FONT]


[FONT=&quot]GAMEDAY PROGRAMS [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Minneapolis, MN [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Program Vendor[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 04/2008 – 10/2008[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Gave programs, containing score cards and statistics of the Minnesota Twins to customers.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Sold 10-50 programs per Twins home game.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Worked various locations around the perimeter of the Metrodome.[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]NOKOMIS PUBLIC LIBRARY [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Minneapolis, MN [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Library Supervising Assistant[/FONT][FONT=&quot] 06/2002 – 08/2002[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Organized the bookshelves and library area.[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]o [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Read to children and created a happy and fun environment. [/FONT]


Here is my cover letter:

[FONT=&quot]Dear Mr./Ms. Last Name or [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Dear Hiring Manager for [name of position][/FONT][FONT=&quot],[/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]I am writing to you because I believe my training, experience, and proven ability in technical support will allow me to significantly contribute to your company's IT division.
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]In reviewing the attached resume, you will note that I have acquired valuable experience in all facets of troubleshooting, installations, and maintenance for various desktop operations, hardware, and software. I possess a unique talent for delivering highly complex technical information into terms and concepts that the end users can readily grasp. Furthermore, I am multi-task oriented, enjoy a challenge, and continually stay abreast of the latest advancements in the IT field.
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]If you are seeking an IT professional who has excellent people and problem solving skills, then please consider what I have to offer. I believe it would be mutually beneficial for us to meet and discuss the goals of your company and how my technical abilities can help you achieve those goals. I will call your office in a few days to inquire about a mutually convenient time.
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Thank you for your time and consideration.
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]Sincerely,
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]First Last
[/FONT]

By the way, I took a typing test and I type at 65 wpm, but I'm not sure where to fit it. I could probably place it the "software skills" section, then change software skills to "skills". Would that work?

Comments

  • hackman2007hackman2007 Member Posts: 185
    I'm not a resume expert, so take my advice with a grain of salt. But after a quick look....

    The first thing that jumps out at me is the education. What do you mean by "general education credits"? To me, that means classes not at all related to IT. The fact that it has taken you about 5 years to obtain these credits would worry me as an employer as well. Perhaps just mention what you are going towards instead of saying you have general education credits?

    1. Your software section is a bit bizarre. It feels like you are stretching to list software programs you have used. Does it really matter that you have used Internet Explorer? Unless you have some type of certification or are an expert, I would take it off. Now if you have used something like Microsoft Outlook (or some other program businesses regularly use then I could understand listing that).

    2. "Assist co-workers in sorting packages when they are backed up, so they can get caught up to a normal pace." Take the comma out of that sentence.

    3. "Gave programs, containing score cards and statistics of the Minnesota Twins to customers." Take the comma out of the sentence.
  • CenturionMarioCenturionMario Member Posts: 82 ■■■□□□□□□□
    The first thing that jumps out at me is the education. What do you mean by "general education credits"? To me, that means classes not at all related to IT. The fact that it has taken you about 5 years to obtain these credits would worry me as an employer as well. Perhaps just mention what you are going towards instead of saying you have general education credits?

    I have been in and out of school during that duration. I was going full-time initially, then I went part time to try to find a job, then I stopped going for a year, then I went back full-time into computer porgramming (didn't work out), then I found another job, then I went into HVAC (didn't work out). Right now, I'm not attending classes. I did take 2 computer hardware related courses and passed those ones. I plan on going to WGU (I have much more motivation now than I did back then), but I want to get a job first so I can save money and not have to take out loans (I already owe 2 loans). I realize that it is definitely a red flag, and I've been thinking about ways of rewording the description and dates.
    1. Your software section is a bit bizarre. It feels like you are stretching to list software programs you have used. Does it really matter that you have used Internet Explorer? Unless you have some type of certification or are an expert, I would take it off. Now if you have used something like Microsoft Outlook (or some other program businesses regularly use then I could understand listing that).

    You're right. I'll edit that, as well as the comma part. What do you think about the AV software, though? should I leave that in?
  • hackman2007hackman2007 Member Posts: 185
    I'm not sure how I feel about the AV software.

    What kind of stuff did you do in the computer hardware classes? Since you have learned this material, you could list it in a skills section. The one thing I've noticed about job applications is, unless you are applying to small businesses, your resume goes in to a database.
  • CenturionMarioCenturionMario Member Posts: 82 ■■■□□□□□□□
    We didn't play with the hardware, it was more of a "identify this hardware" class. To be honest, it wasn't anything that I already knew.

    And I'm well aware of keywords, but because I don't have much experience, and I've only worked an entry level position (unpaid), I'm not sure what specific keywords I can put to stand out. I've never used Active Directory or Group Policy at the job (but I've tinkered with it at home), as well as other typical keywords that HR likes to use when searching for job applicants.
  • TurgonTurgon Banned Posts: 6,308 ■■■■■■■■■□
    I would be inclined to spend more time on the actual job search to be honest than getting hung up on your CV. Who are you applying to for work? In terms of your CV it needs work. You have a cover letter which is a good thing although I would be inclined to make some modifications to that which I will come on to. You have a few things going for you and a few against in my opinion. You describe yourself as an IT Professional but I dont see any long work history backing that up. Your recent job has you handling packages for a couple of years which generally isn't a springboard to the IT department. What you basically need is a break into this industry.

    Some plus points for you... A decent cover letter, it's clear you want to make a positive impression on an employer but I think you would do better by leveling with the reader that you are a self starter ready for an entry level position. But you must do this in a positive way without going over the top by using 'excellent' and 'unique talent', while at the same time not coming over as needy. You have obtained certifications to support this objective so more of that please in your CV.

    You have some recent job history which is good, and some volunteering which ticks boxes with people. Any aspects of your education that are computer related I would get across in your CV. Similarly any aspects of computer literacy or support in any of your jobs you should highlight a bit more and especially any responsibilities you had to provide service to people or to ensure computerised systems of any sort were maintained or kept secure. Similarly any supervisory or reporting or inventory experience or recording of incidents of anytime. IT work these days is more structured than it used to be so employers are looking at people who are used to ordered ways of working but also capable of handling a lot going on. A proper helpdesk/support position is very busy indeed so what qualities have you demonstrated in your previous jobs to handle competing demands on your time? Get it all across. That Atlas job has quite a bit going for it if you can work on that.

    Many people are in the habit of making lists of responsibilities but I find a well written paragraph describing what you did at work can go a little further. A CV isn't the story of your life but you want it to tell the reader something about what you have done, what you want to do, and what you are doing to accomplish that. In other words convince the reader that you are ready for the job that you want.
  • CenturionMarioCenturionMario Member Posts: 82 ■■■□□□□□□□
    Turgon: I've been applying to entry level positions, anyone that I can find where I think I have even a hint of being qualified for (and a few reaching ones). I don't have a car (I use public transportation) so that somewhat limits myself in terms of trying to get jobs that are 10-15+ miles away from where I am. I use many different job boards and company websites to apply, so I'm not just applying to one specific job board.

    I'm still trying to figure out how to tailor my objective. I've seen some samples and this seems good for an entry level objective:

    "A Programmer/Analyst position which will provide me with the opportunity to develop skills in software design"

    "To obtain a position as an Electronics Technician"

    "To obtain a position as a _________ in a ________ company while continuing my education"

    I've also changed my cover letter to seem less demanding, and more informing. I think HR would like that.
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