Resume Critique Please!

ArabianKnightArabianKnight Member Posts: 278 ■■■□□□□□□□
I recently had my resume revised professionally to be "oriented" to entry level IT work. I do not have formal IT work experience and was shocked to see what it came back like. I have edited this a little after I got it back but wanted to see your opinion of it now. When reviewing it, it would seem like I have years of IT exp but I do not, and am worried this may seem unethical in some way.

Comments

  • PolynomialPolynomial Member Posts: 365
    I mean, visually, it looks good. But its so dense. And its too long. HR will literally give you 10 seconds, if that, and this resume fails the test. Especially considering all your buzzwords are at the bottom. (which are probably exaggerated according to your feelings)

    Maybe its just me, but I don't understand the format. I've never seen a resume that merges all your skills together and then lists employment history. I'm not sure why you're listing your GPA either.

    Also I'd hire anyone named Rick James on the spot. Too bad that's not your real name =(
  • ArabianKnightArabianKnight Member Posts: 278 ■■■□□□□□□□
    Here is the email the guy sent me with my resume. What do you think about the arguments used for this kind of resume, do you think the first page "will impress the heck out of the reader".


    Attached is your Resume.


    I used a “combination” resume format, which not only allows me to highlight your most marketable skills on pg. 1, but has also been found by the Department of Labor to be most effective for people with extensive military service. This is a very reliable format and it will get you interviews. That being said, a little fine-tuning of the details never hurt anything and I welcome your feedback, comments or questions.

    I used Information Technology Specialist as a title for your resume and this will serve you for a broad range of job opportunities, but I recommend that when applying for a specific job you delete Information Technology Specialist and substitute the EXACT title of the position you’re going for (this is an “open” document and easy to accomplish). Another option – if you feel the situation warrants it – is to simply use the word “Profile.”

    The battle of this type resume will be won or lost on the first page. And by “winning” I mean: the reader has decided to call you in for an interview. Remember: the function of a resume is to get you an interview. No one’s going to hire you off a resume; this is something you’ll have to accomplish at the interview.

    The format of page 1 is extremely reliable. If we can’t “win” in this first page, then 10 more pages of data won’t help. I chose what I thought were the most impressive/germane bullets for this page, but if you’d rather use another bullet or feel inspired to write a new one, by all means do so. Just remember that we’ll have to delete something to make room. Think of page 1 as a football field or a tennis court: within its bounds we can make an infinite number of plays, but we can’t go “out of bounds.”

    Now, in light of the true function of page 1 – which is to impress the heck out of the reader – the proper function of page 2 is to back up the assertions of page 1, which is done by work history, education, etc.; this is presented in what is now the most commonly-accepted and easily-understood format for this type information.

    One critical thing to keep in mind here is: we can't go beyond two pages. In today's job market, we are getting increasing feedback that 3+ page resumes are simply being tossed out. This isn't because hiring managers are lazy; it's just that they are looking at 100s of resumes for each open position, and in this environment they are making a lot of snap judgments. The snap judgment when it comes to an overly long resume is: "this candidate will always be taking 20 minutes to give us 2 minutes' worth of information. Next."
  • olaHaloolaHalo Member Posts: 748 ■■■■□□□□□□
    Ive always been a 1 page resume guy
  • yoshiiakiyoshiiaki Member Posts: 48 ■■□□□□□□□□
    I'm not a professional at setting up resumes. Last time I needed one I got it critiqued here as well. I'm curious as to why the guy states "The format of page 1 is extremely reliable. If we can’t “win” in this first page, then 10 more pages of data won’t help" and also states "Now, in light of the true function of page 1 – which is to impress the heck out of the reader". He follows it up with " the proper function of page 2 is to back up the assertions of page 1," Now I get wanting to backup your claims in page 1 and I understand the reasoning of it, but going off purely what he said, if page one doesn't "win" as he puts it, what use is page 2? I think off his logic it'd be best to put everything in one page. But again, take anything I say with a grain of salt. I'm know there's people here better suited to answer. Just really wanted to ask my question.

    2013 Goals: [x] Sec+ [x] CCNA []Proj+ []OSCP
    2013 Stretch Goals: [] CCNA-Sec []Land Sec job
  • ArabianKnightArabianKnight Member Posts: 278 ■■■□□□□□□□
    Ok, I filled out profiles and put my resume on:
    Indeed.com
    SimplyHired.com
    MilitaryHire.com
    RecruitMilitary.com
    Vetjobs.com
    My state job board
    Monster
    CareerBuilder.com
    ClearanceJobs.com
    LinkedIn

    Lets see how this plays out
  • DCDDCD Member Posts: 475 ■■■■□□□□□□
    Just like Polynomial said I would hire you on the spot with a name like Rick Jamesicon_cheers.gif.

    First I would put your name and phone, email address together in the center or right side. Next I would have a solid line under each title instead of broken up like they are. The Information Tech Specialist section looks like an outline for a cover letter. I would replace the Info Tech Specialist with the education and Training section and move the military stuff to the bottom. The (Military: Specialist (E-4), Army National Guard) I would move to the employment section.
    If you want to leave it as is I would add the ComTIA logo's to the top left corner. That my 2 cents.
  • ArabianKnightArabianKnight Member Posts: 278 ■■■□□□□□□□
    I had made some changes and re-uploaded my resume. I added logos and changed the font size in some areas as well as underline my job titles.
  • JasionoJasiono Member Posts: 896 ■■■■□□□□□□
    The quality of the logos are not good. I would use the ones on the comptia website that you log in to to see your certs.
  • ArabianKnightArabianKnight Member Posts: 278 ■■■□□□□□□□
    Jasiono wrote: »
    The quality of the logos are not good. I would use the ones on the comptia website that you log in to to see your certs.

    They look much better on the word document, I used PDF because the word file was too big for the attachment here and I toned down the PDF quality.
  • ITdude84ITdude84 Member Posts: 58 ■■□□□□□□□□
    "Im Rick James ...... lol I wont go there, I would hire you too also with that email address ;) I would shrink the resume down a bit most HR people only look at a resume for a few seconds, if they are not "interested" they will pass it up.
  • DCDDCD Member Posts: 475 ■■■■□□□□□□
    Put the logo's in the top left corner. Make these a single underline (INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY SPECIALIST, PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE, EDUCATION & TRAINING).

    This (Military: Specialist (E-4), Army National Guard) should not be under the technical skills section.

    Put your name and contact info in one spot. In the center or to the right.
  • webgeekwebgeek Member Posts: 495 ■■■■□□□□□□
    IMHO I would remove the logs from your resume. No need for redundancy on a resume.
    BS in IT: Information Assurance and Security (Capella) CISSP, GIAC GSEC, Net+, A+
  • ArabianKnightArabianKnight Member Posts: 278 ■■■□□□□□□□
    I have made some changes. I left the logos and moved them to the top left, I wanted them because they look "sexy" and should catch the recruiter eyes. I also deleted the military bullet from the bottom.
  • webgeekwebgeek Member Posts: 495 ■■■■□□□□□□
    I have made some changes. I left the logos and moved them to the top left, I wanted them because they look "sexy" and should catch the recruiter eyes. I also deleted the military bullet from the bottom.

    IMHO I like that your logos now have little distortion.
    BS in IT: Information Assurance and Security (Capella) CISSP, GIAC GSEC, Net+, A+
  • DCDDCD Member Posts: 475 ■■■■□□□□□□
    Better, You should move the telphone number over so it in line with the other contact info. Enlarge the logos and make them the same size and level. I would still move the education up HR is looking for the buzz words Win7 Linux.
  • ArabianKnightArabianKnight Member Posts: 278 ■■■□□□□□□□
    I have uploaded an update to the resume again. I have reversed the pages and aligned the personal info as well as make the logos a little bigger. I cannot get them aligned for some reason, I can't move the individual boxes and I can only re-size them. It kinda looks like a triangle, like it was done on purpose so I am not worried.
  • XyroXyro Member Posts: 623
    Though many would disagree with me, I like the logos. The resume starts out great, then it fizzles out for me. It's simply too much information to read. I would not wish to weed through the many paragraphs of collective wordings.

    Also, general rule is if GPA is not 3.4/3.5 or above, leave it off.

    There are errors in the formatting of the "Education & Training" section such as the inconsistency of underlining.

    Again, the paragraphs are just too much. There are too many words to read through.

    First you have the primary paragraph which begins with an exceptionally long, dragged out sentence whose second & third sentences are mismatched, in reference, to the first sentence. You then have an overly long "Technical Skills" section that most mortals would not read in its entirety. These two are all topped off with an extremely long-winded "Professional Highlights" section that, IMHO, would (if he/she even made it through page 1) undoubtedly cause the reader to ditch the resume. It's like the straw that broke the camel's back.

    The "Employment" section, if valid, is played-down which is a big mistake IMO. This is the area I would have played up, yet it's crammed, almost hidden, at the bottom of the resume.

    Note also that there are some errors on top with alignment & capitalization. I just noticed that now. The logos distracted me lol.
  • ArabianKnightArabianKnight Member Posts: 278 ■■■□□□□□□□
    OK, here it is without the fluff! Got it down to 1 page!
  • XyroXyro Member Posts: 623
    Ok, this is much easier to read but still requires more work.

    1. I liked the top much better before, but I realize this is a matter of spacing/room & personal preference.
    2. Still need to capitalize town name.
    3. Remove "Certifications" under "TECHNICAL PROFICIENCIES". You already have the logos, so this is redundant. It's also a bit conflicting in terms of the grammatical relation.
    4. I like the technical proficiencies section but some may not agree.
    5. As soon as the "EDUCATION" section begins, though, there are issues. You have inconsistencies in formatting (mainly font) & job descriptions (present/not present).


    You're getting there!
  • ArabianKnightArabianKnight Member Posts: 278 ■■■□□□□□□□
    OK, so I added some job descriptions even though i could not elaborate due to space concerns. I wanted to leave my it certs line for applicant tracking systems to pick up on the keywords as the images will not transfer. Keeping it 1 page and formatting evenly was the hard part.
  • XyroXyro Member Posts: 623
    Eh, I like this.

    The way the logos step down from one another & moving the certifications to the bottom of "TECHNICAL PROFICIENCIES" were both great ideas, IMO. Also, the formatting is now much more consistent. I do notice 1 error of font size though. At least it seems to be, unless my eyes are out for the night lol as I've been reading icon_study.gif since 11am. The font in the "Communications" line is somewhat larger than all other lines. I don't know if you wanted it this way/it was an oversight/you don't care.

    Aside of this, and others may disagree, I think this is a vast improvement over what you initially started with.

    Edit:
    Now that I've looked over this in the morning, with rested eyes, I also realize you have an inconsistency in comma usage when listing items (King's comma vs. Contemporary). Either keep the final comma before the conjunction or ditch it, but not a mix of both.
  • ArabianKnightArabianKnight Member Posts: 278 ■■■□□□□□□□
    Thank you all for your input. I think I have it all set up the way I like, and only 1 page too. Now to start applying for jobs!
  • DCDDCD Member Posts: 475 ■■■■□□□□□□
    I would move the certifications under education. If you can increase the font size of your name and line up all the bullet points under High Qualified Field Engineer the third row is how it should be.
  • xe3tecxe3tec Member Posts: 16 ■□□□□□□□□□
    I dont know if your way is the way in the US in general but in Europe they'd bitchslap you for that.

    1. too much info on the page, its suffocating
    2. give it some space, 2 pages are not a problem...
    3. use LaTeX..make it prettier
    Goal 2013: CCNA, CCNA Security
  • petedudepetedude Member Posts: 1,510
    Heard today that recruiting outfits may be OK with 2-3 page resumes for technical roles.

    During one period of searching, no one talked to me until I busted out a multi-page resume with a gazillion multi-line bullet points. Seems as if you don't spill your guts on paper, they don't know what you know.

    Just my two cents, FWIW.
    Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
    --Will Rogers
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